


You are not a monster

by LoveDevilKing



Series: Monster [3]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, F/M, Pierce is dead, did I mention smut?, wings reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 02:03:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 27,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20788775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveDevilKing/pseuds/LoveDevilKing
Summary: What lengths will Chloe go to in order to protect the ones she loves? What will that mean for her partnership with Lucifer.





	1. Chloe

**Author's Note:**

> This work takes place immediately after the events of 'Devil of My Word' and is AU because it is part of a series where Chloe has known the truth about Lucifer for some time. It also diverges from canon at this point and in no way follow season 4.
> 
> You can probably read this story as a stand alone, but if you want more on the events that happened before, please see the other stories in the series.
> 
> Thank you for stopping by; I hope you enjoy.

_”Chloe! Don’t go in there. It’s a trap.” Dan’s voice was urgent and on the verge of panic._

_”I know. Pierce just tried to kill us.” Just then the sound of 6 gunshots rang out and Chloe hung up the phone before Dan could say another word. _

It was eerily still when Chloe made it back to the loft. The signs of a gun battle were unmistakable. Bits of drywall, plaster and bullet casings littered the floor. There was also blood spatter and other white debris. 

She saw the bodies as well. 

She finally noticed Lucifer kneeling next to the prone figure of Pierce. One look was all it took to know that the Lieutenant was dead. Lucifer’s back was to her and she called out his name. When he turned to face her, her mind went blank and her eyes widened. She couldn’t breathe. There didn’t seem to be enough air in the room anymore. His worried 'Detective?' finally brought her back to herself.

“Lucifer. What the fuck?!” She couldn’t keep the slight tremor out of her voice.

Lucifer reached out to her and noticed scarred red hands tipped with black claws.

His hands.

A monster’s hands.

Those same hands now flew to his face, but he already knew what they would find. His devil face had returned. 

“I thought you said you no longer had that face.” Her voice was a little steadier now that the initial shock had worn off. 

She had known for several months that Lucifer was the actual biblical Devil, but she had only seen his eyes. She had completely freaked out at the time but after talking to Linda and spending several days too drunk to see, she had finally come to grips with the situation. She had also had a very long chat with Lucifer. They had continued as partners with Lucifer being a better asset now that she knew of his supernatural abilities. Admittedly, it had been hard at first and sometimes things would catch her off guard, like now, but all in all, life had gotten back to normal. Well, a new normal anyway.

“I had but it seems to have returned. Most likely because I killed a human,” he said gesturing to Pierce. “Father frowns on that sort of thing, you know.” He tried for levity, but it came out resigned.

“Well, make it go away,” she said waving her hands at him in a shooing motion. “SWAT could be here at any minute if Dan called it in. He and Ella figured out it was a trap.” She had moved closer to the body on the ground as she spoke. She was having trouble looking at Lucifer and she hated herself for it, but a primal part of her brain kept screaming _run, danger_.

After a moment, she looked back at him only to see that his face hadn’t changed and there was a hint of panic in his eyes.

“Detective, I can’t change back.” He tried to control his breathing hoping that he could calm down enough to change back into his human form, but it wasn’t working. Nothing was. 

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath trying to calm her thoughts. She had to think straight if she was going to get them out of this. Looking down at the floor and trying to focus she once again noticed the strange white stuff everywhere. There was even one piece big enough to be identified as part of a white feather. 

With blood on it. 

A large white feather with blood on it. She picked it up, her eyes snapping to his face.

“Lucifer?” she said, her voice low and questioning, holding out the piece of feather. “Are you hurt?” 

Concern for her partner overrode any misgivings she still held, and she advanced on Lucifer looking for an injury. Pushing his jacket open she could see bullet holes in his shirt but no blood. She went to turn him around and noticed the cut on his sleeve. However, the wound was not bleeding enough to justify the amount of blood she was seeing. It also didn’t explain the feathers.

“I’m fine,” he assured her. “It’s just my wings. They will heal.”

She gaped at him. “What happe...?”

She stopped herself because she knew, deep down she knew what must have happened. After Pierce’s guy had shot her and knocked her unconscious, Lucifer protected her with his wings, protected them both most likely. Wings that had been shot over a hundred times judging by the number of shell casings she saw.

Wings made vulnerable since she was near.

She just looked at him, a lump forming in her throat. She had no words to express the flood of emotions swirling around her insides at that moment.

“No need to concern yourself, Detective” he scoffed, looking away. The tears in her eyes were making him uncomfortable. She shouldn’t be crying over him. She should be running away. Why wasn’t she running away?

She just closed her eyes until she had regained her composure.

“I think I should leave. In fact, I think we should both leave.” Lucifer wasn’t afraid of the consequences for himself, but he didn’t think it was going to look very good if her fellow officers found her over the dead body of their boss. And he knew he couldn’t hang around in his demon form. 

“Both of us can’t leave,” she told him. “We’re partners; they’ll assume we both came here if Dan didn't tell them already. Just let me think.” 

She began pacing back and forth, holding onto her head as if trying to keep it from exploding. There had to be a way to get them out of this situation and protect Lucifer. No matter what he was or what he said, he was her friend, her partner, her maybe something else. He always had her back. It was her turn to have his. Gradually a plan began to form.

“Can you get to Lux without being seen?” she asked. Lucifer flexed his shoulders as if to check something but told her he thought he could.

“Good. Now, help me gather up the feathers.”

“Why?” he exclaimed.

“Do you really want Ella or anyone else to get their hands on these?” she asked him, her tone incredulous.

She began picking them up. They were the softest things she had ever felt. She knew he had wings, but she had never seen them even though he offered to show her numerous times. The feathers even seemed to glow but that was probably just her imagination. With each one she picked up, her heart ached a little more. How much had he suffered because of her? Was this another in a long line of things he had done for her? She knew the answer was probably yes and she didn’t deserve it. She didn’t deserve him! Why did he stay around her when she made him vulnerable? Why did he ALWAYS stay?

But she knew why, in her heart she knew even when she wouldn’t let herself acknowledge that she felt the same. He never said it, could never say it perhaps, but then again, she never said it either. However, he showed it in a million small ways every day.

With Lucifer’s help they were able to gather most of the feathers. Whatever was left, she hoped would be explained away somehow but she wasn’t too worried about it.

“Can you take these with you?” She had taken off her jacket in order to have something to put the feathers in and now she tried to give them to Lucifer. “I don’t want to put them in the trash.”

“Yes, I can take them, but I can get rid of them here.” Lucifer had put the ones he gathered in a pile at his feet and took the ones from Chloe. He then pulled out his lighter and crouched down, setting the pile of fire. The feathers caught and Chloe would be lying if she said she wasn’t affected by the sight. 

She put her coat back on then moved to the side of the room across from the staircase and behind one of the pillars.

“Get behind me.” Only hesitating slightly, Lucifer complied but before he could ask why, she had pulled her gun and fired off several rounds at various places in the loft until the gun was empty. She then threw it to the side.

“What are you doing?” Lucifer asked once he could be heard again.

“I need to make it look like I was firing back. Because of all the bullets,” she said in response to his confused expression, hand gesturing to the floor.

“Oh, right” Lucifer walked over to Pierce and leaned down to remove the knife in his chest but halted when Chloe shouted 'No!' He looked back at her.

“You can’t take it. It’s evidence.”

“Do you really want Ella or whomever to get their hands on a demon blade?” He said throwing her words back at her.

“A knife is easier to explain than feathers.” She snapped back. The events of the day were starting to catch up with her and she was taking her frustrations out on Lucifer.

“Fine. I’ll leave you to it.” He began to leave but she couldn’t let him go just yet.

“I’m sorry,” she signed heavily, “It’s just that we don’t have much time and I’m still freaking out a little. Pierce’s death is going to cause a shit storm and we need to work together if we are going to get out of this. Okay?” She tried to reassure him. She needed his help if her plan was going to succeed and hoped he would go along with her.

“You’re right,” he sighed, “What do you suggest we do now, Detective?”

Now for the rest of the plan.

She didn’t think – scratch that – she knew he was not going to like her plan, but she had to convince him it was the right thing to do. 

“I need you to hit me.” She stated it with as little emotion as she could muster.

“What! No! Absolutely not.” He couldn’t believe what she just said.

“Lucifer, I know you don’t want to, but you have to,” she pleaded with him. “We have to make it look like I killed Marcus.”

“Detective, no. I can’t let you do that,” he beseeched her.

“Lucifer please, it’s the only way.”

“But that would be a lie.” The very thought made his insides go cold and it reflected in his voice.

“We don’t have a choice. You can’t change back so you can’t be here when they find us. How are we going to explain that Pierce has a knife in his chest if I don’t have a scratch on me?” She knew it went against everything he stood for. “Look, I’m not going to say that I _actually_ killed him, just make it look like I did and let them draw their own conclusions.”

He just looked at her like she had lost her mind. Maybe he had broken her with his whole devil face showing up unexpectedly because the Detective would NEVER stage a crime scene. He wouldn’t let her do that. Not for him.

“I can’t,” came his breathless reply.

“Please, Lucifer. Help me.” She begged. She hated herself for what she was doing but she couldn’t see any other way. However, she could see that Lucifer was not going to go along with the plan. She couldn’t say she was surprised.

“Okay, never mind, we’ll think of some…,” she never got to finish before the whole side of her face went numb.

She never even saw him move, he was that fast.

“Detective, forgive me,” Lucifer reached out to her but did not touch her, his guts twisting with what he had just done.

Chloe staggered a little but rushed to reassure him that she was alright. “It’s alright. I’m fine.” She ran her tongue along her bottom lip and tasted blood. “I wasn’t expecting it. It was better that way. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. I’ve hurt you, Detective.”

“But I asked you to. It’s alright, really.”

She so badly wanted to reassure him that everything was fine, but she had to wonder if she was doing more damage than either of them could handle. But she wasn’t done, and the next part could drive them apart forever.

“Now, I need you to choke me.”

“Chloe! Absolutely not. You cannot ask that of me. Please.”

At the use of her given name she knew she had gone too far. He never called her Chloe unless he lost control.

“Lucifer, I am so, so sorry to ask this of you. I know you would never hurt me in a million years, and I hate myself for asking but trust me, it has to be this way. This will work.” 

He wouldn’t look at her. She gripped his forearm and tried to turn him, but it was like trying to move a mountain. He wouldn’t budge. Finally, he looked back at her. The fiery depths of his irises held her gaze, but the expression in them was shuttered. She tried to read his face, but nothing showed on his scarred and damaged visage. In that moment he looked every bit the ancient being he was. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking or if this was when he finally decided he had had enough of her and fled. She couldn’t blame him if he did.

Lucifer blinked and brought one hand up toward her throat but couldn’t quite bring himself to touch her. He had inflicted pain on countless souls who came into his realm, had strangled his share of the mortals he and the Detective had tracked down over the years, but they had all deserved it. Chloe didn’t. How could he wrap his hands around her slender throat and squeeze? It should be physically impossible, but she asked it of him. He could never deny her, had never denied her, but he didn’t know if he could do this for if he did, he would truly be a monster.

Chloe kept her gaze steady, willing him to go along with her and hating herself more every minute. How could she do this to him? How could she ASK this of him? She just hoped their relationship would survive the damage she was inflicting. 

After several long minutes while she kept expecting back up to arrive, Lucifer finally placed his hand around her throat. She hoped he would make it quick at least.

Even though she was expecting it, she couldn’t really be prepared for when Lucifer squeezed. It was brief, thank – well, Dad (?) – but her vision still began to narrow, and her survival instinct kicked in so that she started clawing at his hand. Before she could get any purchase, he had released her and walked away.

She was coughing, her eyes were watering, and she was trying to get air back in her lungs. She bent over and rested her hands on her knees trying to regulate her breathing. She couldn’t stop coughing.

After she had got her breath back somewhat, she went over once again to reassure him that everything was fine, and he hadn’t done anything wrong, but she stopped herself from touching him. His rigid stance and tense shoulders told her he did not want to be touched.

“Lu...,” she croaked before clearing her throat and trying again. “Lucifer, I’m sorry,” her voice no more than a whisper. “Promise me… that you will… wait… for me… at the penthouse. I’ll come as soon… as I can.” It was hard to breathe and talk.

He didn’t reply and he wouldn’t look at her.

“Please promise me.” She pleaded. She knew he would never break a promise and she had to make sure he didn’t leave L.A. so that she could have a chance to repair the damage she had caused.

“Yes, Detective,” his voice devoid of any emotion, “I will be at the penthouse until such time as you can come.”

“Thank you,” relief evident in her voice. Without looking at her once, he fled.


	2. Lucifer

Lucifer landed on the balcony and crashed into the deck chairs. He had barely made it back to Lux. Most of his flight feathers were in shambles and he was pretty sure the left wing was broken. He needed a drink.

Once he was standing again, he stumbled his way to the bar. Reaching over he grabbed the first bottle he could lay his hands on. He wrenched off the top and took several long pulls straight from the bottle which is something he would never normally do. But today was not normal. No, things would never be normal again. The Detective - he shut down that train of thought. He couldn’t think about her now. The pain in his chest wouldn’t let him breathe when he thought of her and what he did.

He finished the first bottle and started on a second but this time he at least used a glass. His wings hung down his back, dragging the floor but there was no way he could put them away. He needed to get the bullets out. He knew he had started healing and had healed over several of them already. If he had one of Maze’s knives, he would just cut the bloody things off again but no such luck. She had taken all her stuff when she moved out.

He needed help and could only think of one person; at least she had seen his devil face before so she wouldn’t be terrified. At least he hoped she wouldn’t. He pulled out his phone and called Linda.

“Hello,” she answered after a few rings. Something in her voice should have clued him in to the fact that something was up.

“Doctor! I’m in need of your services. Can you pop over for a bit?” He asked in a forced cheery voice, trying to sound more confident than he felt.

“Lucifer, this really isn’t a good time. Can this wait until tomorrow?”

“’Fraid not, see my wings have been shot up and I can’t get the bullets out without some help. And before you say, ‘I’m not that kind of doctor’ you really are my only option.” He gritted his teeth and grunted when a muscle spasm hit his left shoulder.

“What!” Linda exclaimed. In the background he thought he heard another voice but didn’t know who it was. Linda put her hand over the phone, but he still heard her say, “Yes, it’s Lucifer.”

“Who’s there? Is that Maze?!” he shouted. “What’s that hell spawn doing there?” He could feel the fury building up inside at the thought of Maze and her betrayal. She must have been working with that low-life. Cain had one of her knives, didn’t he?! Of all people, Cain?!

Before Linda could answer, Maze was on the line, apparently having wrestled the phone from Linda.

“What the hell Lucifer, you’re hurt?” Maze demanded.

“What’s it to you? Sorry your boyfriend didn’t finish me off?”

“What are you talking about?” she asked.

“He had one of your knives, Mazikeen,” his voice was cold and menacing.

“We’re on our way.” 

“No, not yo...,” but she had already hung up the phone. All he could do now was wait.

An hour later Maze and Linda arrived at the penthouse. When they exited the elevator, they found Lucifer sitting at the bar with his shirt off and drinking. Linda couldn’t contain a gasp when she saw Lucifer in full demonic form. It had been a while since she had seen his face and truth be told she always hoped she would never have to see it again but, that didn’t look like the case.

Maze had no problems with Lucifer’s form, it wasn’t like she hadn’t seen it before a million times.

“What the fuck, Lucifer? You look like Hell,” Maze said with her usual straightforward approach.

“Ah, Mazikeen, always stating the obvious,” he countered sarcastically, but then he got a good look at her. One eye was almost swollen shut, there were cuts and scrapes on her face and arms as well as several bruises. She was also favoring her right leg. “You don’t look so hot yourself.”

“Well, you try fighting your way past twelve angry men then running four miles and we’ll see how well YOU look.” If she kept up her bravado, maybe he wouldn’t see how much she was really hurting, not physically but emotionally. Pierce had really gotten into her head when he threatened Linda and she hated how it made her feel.

He looked past Maze to the doctor and realized that Linda had been staring at him since she came out of the elevator. Remembering that he hadn’t prepared her for his new look, he sought to reassure her.

“Doctor,” he said in a soothing tone, “I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about my appearance,” he cast a malevolent look at Maze before continuing, “but you’ve seen me before and you were alright with it, yes?” It really wouldn’t do to have his therapist wig out on him again.

Linda blinked several times but seemed to get a grip on herself judging by the way she closed her eyes and swallowed before addressing Lucifer. “Yes, sorry. I’m just surprised. What happened?” Concern for her friend (yes, her friend) finally overrode her fear.

“We went to confront that sad sack of human excrement, Cain, in his lair and the bastard tried to kill us. The Detec...,” he choked on the name before clearing his throat, “The Detective was shot. Fortunately, she had her vest on, but she was knocked unconscious. Then that dullard ordered his henchmen to shoot and what was I supposed to do? I unfurled before I knew it.” Lucifer gulped the rest of his drink before pouring another. He didn’t remember consciously thinking to use his wings to protect Chloe, but he wasn’t surprised. He would do anything to protect her. He closed his eyes when a fresh pang of remorse hit his system.

“But what about…,” Linda made a sweeping gesture from his head downward.

“Seems Dad gave it all back now that I’ve killed a human.” He grimaced once again as another muscle spasm struck his shoulders.

“Who…?” she started to ask.

“Pierce. We fought, I killed him. He had a demon blade on him. Fancy that?” He cast another dark look toward Maze before turning back around, resting his elbows on the bar.

Maze ignored him; she was looking over his wings. She hated Angel wings, but she had to admit that Lucifer’s were not so bad. Now they were truly a mess. Several feathers were broken or missing, and they were covered in blood. She had no idea how many bullets he took but she knew getting them out now was going to be a bitch. She reached out and touched the right wing near the joint causing Lucifer to snarl and snap at her like a wounded animal.

“Hey,” she snapped back, “get over yourself. We’re here to help, remember?” Maze couldn’t show fear. She knew he was pissed at her, but Linda would not be able to get the bullets out as fast as she could, and it was going to hurt. A lot.

Lucifer grumbled but settled down and went back to his drink. Maze grabbed Linda and headed to the bathroom to get some supplies. When they were out of earshot, Maze began, keeping her voice low.

“Listen to me, I’m going to have to cut those bullets out and it’s gonna hurt like a son-of-a-bitch. Angel wings are really sensitive. What I need you to do is straighten the feathers on the wing I’m not working on as a distraction. You’ll have to remove some but just be quick about it. Lucifer is going to yell, scream and probably lash out, so always be ready to jump out of the way if need be. And be careful when you handle them; they’re wicked sharp. Those wings are weapons.” 

Linda didn’t think her eyes could get any wider without her eyeballs falling out but what Maze was saying had her reeling. She needed to touch his wings as a distraction? She was pretty sure she was going to hurt him by touching his wings. What if he flung her across the room? She shook her head, he asked for her help, she could do this. Straightening her shoulders, she began helping Maze get the supplies before heading back into the living room. They found Lucifer in the same position as before but now he was smoking a joint.

“Have you got anything stronger than that?” Maze asked when she saw the joint. He was going to need something a LOT stronger than weed.

“I think I may have some Special K in the bedroom. Top drawer by the bed.” He called out when Linda headed in that direction. Damn his celestial metabolism. He knew this was going to hurt like hell and nothing really was going to help but it was worth a try.

“Lucifer, you have to promise not to hurt Linda?” Maze demanded.

He just looked at her before nodding his agreement. He really didn’t want to hurt Linda, unintentional as it may be.

“I need you to say it.” She needed his spoken promise.

“Fine,” he said, exasperated. “I promise not to hurt the good Doctor.”

“Good. Can you show Linda how to groom your feathers?” she continued taking charge of the situation, “She’s gonna straighten and remove any loose ones while I work. She needs to know what she’s doing.”

Linda had returned with the illegal pharmaceuticals and handed them to Lucifer who took them with a swig of whiskey. He not only showed her how to realign the feathers but also how to be careful, so she didn’t cut herself. “I will ask for your forgiveness now, Doctor. I may not be at my best during this.”

“It’s alright, Lucifer. I understand.” She patted him on the arm and gave him a small smile. His arm was warm to the touch but hard and leathery, like scar tissue. Which made sense because that’s what it was. It was amazing how soon she had become accustomed to seeing Lucifer in demonic form. It no longer made her afraid.

Maze, meanwhile, had retrieved her blade and positioned herself behind his right wing. She nodded at Linda to start on the left one.

With hesitating fingers, Linda reached out toward the lower feathers. She thought she would start at the bottom and work her way up. She could tell that the wing joint was hanging at an unnatural angle which meant it was probably broken and she really didn’t want to start there. His wing was surprisingly soft and warm and twitched when she made contact. Swallowing past the lump in her throat, she began straightening the individual feathers. She didn’t even realize she was crying.

Lucifer felt himself relax. When was the last time anyone had groomed his wings? Certainly not in Hell and not here on earth. The last time was probably – well – before his Fall. He had forgotten just how nice it could be. 

Then he screamed when Maze went to work.

Lucifer lost track of time. All he knew was pain and misery mixed with pleasure. Linda’s gentle administrations along side Maze’s brutal but skillful bullet removal, gave new meaning to pleasurable pain. He tried to keep still but when Maze reset the broken wing joint, he reacted on instinct and unfortunately struck Linda so hard, she flew several feet across the room. Luckily, she landed on the couch and in a show of true mettle, came right back and continued with her grooming.

He didn’t know if it was the effects of the drugs or exhaustion from his screaming that had him slumped over the bar barely conscious. They had finished without his even being aware. He just laid there, not moving; moving required energy and he was spent. Maybe one of his siblings would show up now and send him to Hell. He wouldn’t resist.

“Thanks, Linda,” Maze told her friend, “I can take it from here.”

“Are you sure? I don’t mind staying.” Linda was looking at Lucifer and even in his demonic state she could tell he was in no shape to look after himself properly.

“Yeah, I got this.” Maze had gone over to Lucifer and was grabbing his arm and draping it around her shoulders. He still had his wings out, being in no condition to will them away.

“Okay but call me if you need anything.” Linda took the trash bag with the remnants of Lucifer’s damaged wings to get rid of them. She remembered burning his other wings in a dumpster with Amenadiel. She figured she would do the same with these.

Maze just nodded to her and turned her attention to Lucifer. He was practically dead weight and normally she wouldn’t have a problem, but she was still nursing injuries of her own.

“Come on, let’s get his Highness into bed,” Maze coaxed.

“Not… King… any… more.” Lucifer grumbled but got to his feet. “Don’t… need,” he broke off.

“Well, you’re getting my help anyway. You can kill me in the morning once you sleep it off.”

He grunted a reply, Maze couldn’t make it out, but she got him to the bed and allowed him to pitch forward and land face first, wings outspread. He was asleep or passed out before she got his second shoe off. Throwing a sheet over him, she went back to the living room to get her own drink. She sat on the couch, took out her phone and began her vigil.

Lucifer woke to sunlight filtering through the curtains over the windows and a tickling sensation on his nose. The light he understood but the tickling took a moment to register. It was a feather. His wings had drawn up and around him while he slept, and he had tucked his head half way under one of them. He knew they were healed but he also knew he was still in his demonic form. The events of the previous day came crashing in on him making him wince and want to stay curled up for eternity.

With a shrug of his shoulders, his wings disappeared, and he got up. No sense in staying in bed all day. After showering and putting on shirt and trousers he padded barefoot into the living room only to come to a complete stop when he saw Maze on the couch.

She didn’t say anything and just sat there. He looked at her for a moment before heading over to the bar to grab a drink. Who cared that it was 8 o’clock in the morning?

“I am grateful for the service you have rendered me but it by no means wipes your slate clean.” Lucifer’s voice was cold, distant and he did not look at her. 

Maze got up and went to stand behind Lucifer. She addressed him in low guttural voice that may have been one word or many, it was hard to tell.

Lucifer straightened and slowly turned around. Maze had addressed him by his title in Lilim. She was standing before him with her head bowed in a submissive posture. “What is the meaning of this, Mazikeen?” He spoke to her in the same language.

“My Lord, I have betrayed you and those whom you consider yours.” Maze answered him, keeping with the demonic tongue. “I was foolish and know that the penalty is death. I accept my fate.” When she finished, she knelt and bared her throat. She was ready to die.

Lucifer looked at her, at her posture. He could feel her remorse and knew that she meant every word. She was willing to die. He reached down and grabbed her upper arm and pulled her to her feet.

“You will not die today, Mazikeen,” Lucifer said reverting to English. “You have shown true remorse and willingly submitted yourself for punishment.” He turned back to the bar and poured Maze a drink after refilling his own. “Now, maybe you can tell me why you did it? Why did you work with Cain of all people? What did you hope to accomplish? And how did he get one of your knives?” With each question, the anger in his voice increased in intensity until he was yelling at the last.

Maze stood there and let his anger wash over her. She knew she deserved his wrath but the fact that he didn’t immediately kill her gave her pause. When he finished speaking, she looked at him straight in the eye, “Can we at least sit down? I’m still healing.” She waited for him to make the first move.

Lucifer handed her a drink and gestured for her to proceed him to the couch. He was still feeling the sting of her betrayal but he would hear her out.

“I was hurt,” she began, taking a sip of her drink, “Angry, even. I felt that everyone was leaving me behind and no one wanted me here, so I wanted to go home. The only home I’ve known.” Her voice was quiet. “Ever since we came here, I’ve been changing, feeling things I don’t want to feel, and I hate it.” Now her voice was getting angry thinking about all the pain she had been feeling the last couple of months. “I thought,” she stopped for a moment, “I thought if I could make it so that your life here was over and you had no choice but to return to Hell, you would take me home.”

“How would working with Cain accomplish that?” he asked her, baffled.

“I was going to ‘kill’ him and frame you. Cain wanted to drive a wedge between you and Decker and thought if everyone suspected you killed their boss, she’d have no choice but to side with them.”

Lucifer nodded his head. It might have worked. Even though the Detective knew that Pierce was an immortal, she would never have been able to convince her fellow officers that he wasn’t dead. He knew that the evidence would have been overwhelming, and since he would never submit to a human jail, he may have had to return to Hell as a compromise.

Wasn’t it ironic that he DID kill Pierce and he might HAVE to return to Hell considering his current state?

“So, what happened?” He swept his eyes up and down her body, noting all the damage he could see. She looked a little better than the day before but not much. His anger was dissipating because he really couldn’t blame her. Demons were made for action and not thinking about consequences. He knew she wanted to go home but he had been selfish and wanted her to stay.

“I tracked Pierce down to some warehouse. I was starting to think better about this deal we made and went to tell him I was out. He threatened Linda.” She stopped and looked at him, the expression on his face didn’t change. “I… got distracted with worry and he drugged me.” 

She continued her story with sorrow coloring her voice. “When I came too, my first though was of Linda so, I fought my way out and went to her office. She was fine.” Maze threw back the rest of her drink, having reached the end of her story.

“So that’s how he got your blade?” he asked.

“Yeah. I would never give them up otherwise,” she told him emphatically.

Lucifer got up to get the decanter and refilled both their glasses. He believed her; he would have known if she were lying anyway. Sitting the decanter down he returned to his chair.

“Well, you just might get your wish.” He proceeded while sipping his drink. “I can’t change back. Seems like Dad found a way to send me back to Hell anyway.” He finished off his drink.

Maze just nodded. She had spent the entire night expecting one of his siblings to show up. Angels were forbidden from killing humans that was true, but she didn’t think of Pierce as human. Still, she didn’t think anyone up there would feel the same way.

“You can stay here, on Earth, if you want.” There was a note of resignation in his voice as if he was already preparing to leave and return to Hell.

Maze looked at her former Lord. He had released her from his service, but had since become something more. Something like a friend. She was shocked that he would give her the option of staying here on Earth, but they had been together for eons, she would not desert him now.

“I told you once Lucifer, I’m with you ‘til the end.” She raised her glass toward him in a silent toast and knocked it back in one shot.

Lucifer acknowledged her with a slight nod of his head but said nothing.


	3. Chloe

Chloe opened her eyes to see the rails of a hospital bed. She turned over onto her back and looked at the chair next to the bed hoping to see Lucifer. He had always been there before when she woke up in the hospital. 

But he wasn’t there. He probably wouldn’t be there even if he appeared human, not after what she had made him do. She closed her eyes trying to quell the shame she felt when she thought of what happened earlier that day.

_Earlier_

After Lucifer had left, she had gone over to Pierce’s body and grabbed the knife. She needed her fingerprints on the blade. Then she smeared blood on her hands before lying down and waiting for the SWAT team to arrive.

She didn’t have to wait long.

She heard them breach the front of the building and approach the loft. They swept through the building, rounding up any stray henchmen that may have still been around. They found her on the floor of the loft near Pierce’s body, just as she wanted.

Once SWAT had cleared the building, they had let in the medics. All she could remember was people milling around, light flashing and shouts here and there that were mercifully cut off when they shut the doors of the ambulance. She didn’t see anyone she recognized.

At the hospital, she was wheeled straight into the ED for assessment. X-rays were ordered and taken, blood was drawn and all her injuries documented. When they had determined that she was not in any immediate danger, the doctors finally allowed the forensic team to gather evidence. 

Ella led the team of technicians that came to the hospital. When she saw Chloe’s injuries, she almost broke down and wept but she was able to gather herself and do her job. They swabbed for gunshot residue and took samples of the blood covering hands. Her fingernails were scraped for trace evidence and they bagged her cell phone. Her clothes were placed in brown paper bags along with her shoes. Lastly, pictures were taken of her injuries. When they were through, Ella gave Chloe a hug. She couldn’t help herself. They didn’t speak otherwise.

Throughout it all, Chloe was in a sort of bubble. She felt outside herself, participating but not really present. The doctors called it shock; Chloe called it guilt.

After the forensic team left, the doctor returned to tell her that they were going to keep her overnight for observations. She had a fractured jaw, a bruised larynx and a nice lovely bruised sternum curtesy of the bullet to the chest that fortunately struck her vest. 

The throat injury troubled them the most. They wanted to make sure that the swelling in her neck did not increase to the point that is it closed off her airway. If it did, they would have to intubate, thus the overnight stay. She was not happy with this turn of events. She wanted to go home. She wanted to go to the penthouse. She needed to see Lucifer but it didn’t look like that was going to happen. She didn’t even have her phone to call him and there wasn’t one in the screened off area of the ED where she was laying.

Dan arrived before she was moved to her room. He was understandably upset when he saw the bruises but he was more pissed off that Lucifer had left her to face Pierce alone. She told him that she insisted Lucifer leave (which she did) and she went back in because she was a trained officer of the law (which she was) and he was a civilian (which he was). All true statements, even if they didn’t happen in that order. She hated lying to Dan but he had to come to the same conclusion as everyone else. It was the only way to protect Lucifer and focus the spotlight on herself. So far it was working.

He calmed down enough to tell her that he would pick up Trixie from school and bring her by later. When she asked him about the guy they had at Lucifer’s penthouse, he told her that Ella had placed an anonymous call to the precinct and they left him at the bar in Lux.

She wasn’t sure how they were going to explain why the guy was at Lux but she couldn’t worry about that now. She had enough on her plate. 

Dan had called in back up for Chloe before heading to the loft himself. By the time he got there, it was all over and she was headed to the hospital. He also told her that both he and Ella had been taken off the case but they weren’t suspended yet. Chloe, on the other hand, was suspended with pay until the investigation was complete. It was department policy when an officer was involved in a shooting and Chloe was also the prime suspect in Pierce’s death. She didn’t mind. She was expecting it.

When she got to her room, there was a legal representative from the policeman’s union waiting for her. He told her that based on the evidence he had seen so far, it looked like a clear case of self-defense but she would still have to give a statement. The lawyer also said he would be present during her questioning.

Two detectives arrived to take her statement. She didn’t recognize either of them; they must have been from another jurisdiction which made sense because her entire department was probably under investigation. They introduced themselves and started the questioning.

Her throat was really sore and the doctors didn’t want her to talk much so she kept her answers short.

She told them she and Lucifer went to the loft to talk to Pierce, hoping to get him to confess to Charlotte Richards' murder but they were surprised by his men. She admitted to shooting Pierce when he threatened her partner and being shot in retaliation. She told them that Lucifer had gotten her out of the room but she had returned. She said that there was a fight and Pierce was stabbed. 

Everything she said was the truth, just not the whole truth. Lucifer would have been proud. 

“So, you fought and he hit and choked you?” Detective #1 asked, motioning to her bruised face and neck. She was a short older woman with a no-nonsense attitude.

She nodded her head, not clarifying who ‘he’ was or who she fought with.

“Where did the knife came from?” was her next question.

“Don’t know,” came the raspy reply.

“Do you know how his hand got crushed?” The female detective asked, making notations in her notebook.

“Hand?” Chloe had no idea what they were talking about. What happened to Pierce’s hand?

“Yeah, it was crushed. Not a bone left intact.” Both detectives were looking at her now.

Chloe just shook her head no. She wasn’t about to tell them what she suspected had happened. Lucifer must have crushed it when he fought with Pierce.

“And you knew nothing about this ‘Sinnerman network’?” Detective #2 finally asked. He hadn’t said a word since they walked in the room. He was a younger man with a steely stare. If he was trying for intimidation, he was failing. Her partner was Satan incarnate; it would take a lot to intimidate her. “You dated the Lieutenant, didn’t you?”

“I don’t think that is relevant,” the union lawyer chimed in.

Detective #2 backed down, but didn’t look the least bit chastised. Detective #1 ran damage control.

“Well, I think we have enough for now,” she said, putting away her notebook and looking at her partner. “We’ll let you get some rest but we’ll be talking to you again. We will also be talking to your partner.”

Chloe knew they needed Lucifer’s statement as well, she just hoped they would be content to take it over the phone.

When she was finally alone, she reached for the room’s phone and was in the process of dialing Lucifer’s number when her hands started shaking and she broke down crying. An after effect of her adrenaline rush most likely but she knew what it really was. She was mourning. Mourning for the loss of their partnership, the loss of the trust they once shared, the loss of what might have been. She cried so hard she started coughing and couldn’t get her breath. The nurses came in and gave her something to calm her down and let her rest.

She must have dozed off because she woke later when Dan brought Trixie by to visit. The little girl was saddened to see her Mommy hurt but she was glad that she was okay now and that they had gotten the bad guy. When she asked about Lucifer, Chloe choked up again and had to say that she didn’t know but he was at his house, so he was probably okay. Dan was not saying much on the subject of Lucifer, he hadn’t liked the guy before, and Lucifer hadn’t done anything in Dan’s opinion to change that fact.

Dan also informed her that Internal Affairs was taking over the murder investigation and he had to give them all the notes and evidence they (Dan, Chloe, Lucifer and Ella) had gathered so far. He also thought that the FBI would be getting involved in the organized crime aspect of the case since the Sinnerman crime syndicate stretched from Los Angeles to Baltimore via Chicago. Pierce had worked in all three cities over the past 10 years. It could be years before it was all brought to light.

He and Trixie had been by the apartment after they got dinner in order to get Chloe a change of clothes. Dan knew the ones she had worn would be confiscated for the investigation. They made arrangements for Dan to pick her up the next day since her patrol car had been impounded. He had also brought her phone. Ella had told him that they were through processing it and asked if he could he return it to Chloe. 

She noticed that she had no missed calls or texts from Lucifer. It hurt more than it should.

_Now_

She lay looking out the window into the dark night. After Dan and Trixie left, she didn’t have any visitors and she was left alone with her thoughts. It was little comfort to know that her plan worked and all suspicion was on her. She wanted to talk to Lucifer. She was so worried about him. She had not been able to make herself call or text, coward that she was.

Chloe was saved from her troubled thoughts by a hesitant knock at the door. She looked toward the sound to see Linda standing in the doorway.

“Linda,” she said, pleased to see her friend.

“Mind if I come in?” Linda asked.

Chloe shook her head and motioned for the other woman to come into the room. She was trying to save her voice.

As Linda approached the bed, her brow furrowed as she looked at Chloe, taking in the extent of her injuries. The left side of her face was swollen and turning purple, while the marks on her neck stood out in contrast to her white skin.

“On my God, Chloe, are you okay?” Concern for her friend had her coming closer to the bed. “What happened?”

“Long story,” she said in a whispery, raspy voice. “How did you know I was here?”

“I heard you got shot, so I took a chance and came by.” She had not stopped looking at the bruises on Chloe’s neck. The shape of the marks looked like fingers. Was she choked?

Chloe leaned up eagerly, there was only one place she could have heard that she was shot. “Have you seen Lucifer? Is he okay? Please tell me he is okay?” Her anxiety about him overrode any attempt to save her voice.

“Yes,” Linda said, hesitating, not sure how much to tell her for fear of upsetting the detective. “He was injured as you know,” she paused to see if Chloe was aware of Lucifer’s injuries. At Chloe’s nod, she continued, “We were able to remove the bullets and I think he will heal.” The ‘physically at least’ went unsaid.

“We?” Chloe asked.

“Maze and I,” was her reply.

Chloe sat for several minutes thinking about that. Maze and Lucifer were not exactly on speaking terms and she knew that Marcus was killed by one of Maze’s knives. Just how he came by it, she had no idea. She also didn’t think that Lucifer would willingly place himself under Maze’s care. She wondered how that came about but she would save that for another time. It was a relief to know that Linda had been there to help him, and she knew he would heal quickly without her around.

“Is he…,” she swept her hands around her face and chest hoping Linda would get her meaning.

Apparently, she did because she said, “He is still in his other form. At least he was when I left. Maze stayed with him.”

Well, that sounded like they had definitely made up. She was happy that he wasn’t alone.

“Chloe,” Linda said when Chloe remained silent, “what happened?”

Chloe just looked at her, she could feel the tears starting to form. Her lip was quivering just thinking about if she should tell Linda the truth. What would she think of her if she knew? Linda was his therapist; would she hate her for what she made him do? Could she trust her with the truth?

She knew the answer to the last question. Linda had been her truest friend and had helped her through some of her most trying times. She decided to confide in her.

“Close the door,” she told Linda, sitting up in the bed.

Linda complied with her wishes and pulled up the chair next to the bed.

She told Linda everything, from arriving at Pierce’s loft to finding Lucifer over the lieutenant’s body. She told her how Lucifer was unable to resume his human appearance, so she eventually made him leave but she also needed to control the narrative.

“Linda,” she said, her voice very weak now, “he did this. I made him.” She couldn’t hold back the tears anymore and they silently fell down her face.

“Pierce?” Linda asked, confused.

“No, Lucifer,” she cast her eyes down, too ashamed to look at Linda.

Linda didn’t say anything, but she began to put the pieces together. Lucifer had killed Pierce, but Chloe needed it to look like she did and in self-defense if the bruising was any clue.

“Lucifer hit and choked you?” she asked for clarification, already knowing the answer.

Chloe nodded her head still not looking at the therapist.

“I made him do it,” she repeated, “I didn’t have a choice, Linda.” She looked at Linda then, “I made him lie.” There she had said it, said the one thing that made her heart ache and her insides feel hollow. The one thing she knew he could never forgive.

“Chloe,” Linda sat on the bed and took her hand, “it sounds to me like what you did was to protect Lucifer.” She raised her eyebrow, waiting for Chloe to meet her eye. “There was no way that Lucifer could have remained while in his current state and there would have been too many unanswered questions if you hadn’t done what you did. I’m sure Lucifer understands that.”

Chloe hoped so but she knew she had betrayed Lucifer’s trust to the point that she didn’t think it could ever be repaired.

“Sometimes we have to do the hardest things to protect the ones we love.” Linda told her.

Chloe looked at Linda but didn’t say anything. She laid her head back on the pillows and let the tears continue down her temples into her hair. Linda was right. That was why she did what she did, why she risked losing everything they had built together. She loved him and she would do anything to protect him.

“You have to tell him, Chloe.” Linda said, “Tell him why you did it. He has to know.”

Chloe knew she was right. She had to tell him and hope he could find a way to forgive her.


	4. Lucifer

Lucifer was sitting on his balcony having a drink and looking out over the city. It was late afternoon and the sun on the distant hills made them glow with a golden light. He loved this view and he intended to memorize every detail while he still could. He knew what he had to do now.

Maze had left earlier in the day. Now that they had reconciled their differences, Lucifer asked her to run a few errands, seeing as he couldn’t leave the penthouse. He had made arrangements for if/when he left Los Angeles and he had sent Maze to put those plans in motion. He had changed the disposition of his assets in recent years, ever since meeting the Detective. If nothing else he could take care of the ones he had grown to close to. 

He had never become attached to humanity before. They were fun to have around for pleasure and for the occasional indulgence in a variety of vices but to actually care about them, care about their welfare was a completely new concept. In the last 3 years he had connected with several on a personal level, so much so that he had made arrangements for Linda, Beatrice, the LAPD, even Detective Douche, after he was gone. However, nothing compared to the connection he felt with The Detective.

He thought she was like all the others. Just another beautiful woman to warm his bed for a time. But things began to change when he helped her investigate Delilah’s murder. She intrigued him, vexed him, challenged him in ways no one had before. He thought that if he could just bed her, everything would go back to normal but the longer he was around her, the more her wanted to be around her. He enjoyed working with her. He was a punisher and working with her gave him an outlet to dispense punishment on deserving mortals before they got to Hell. It was thrilling.

Then he became vulnerable and suddenly his life was much more exciting. He reveled in the novelty, much to Maze’s dismay, but he thought it was wonderful. As an immortal being, there wasn’t much that could surprise him. 

When the Detective found out the truth about him, he realized just how much she had come to mean to him when he thought he had frightened her away. He didn’t want to lose the connection he had with her; didn’t want to not have her in his life. He was thrilled when she was able to accept him for who he was and continued their partnership.

In the ensuing months they had grown closer or at least he had grown closer to her. He wanted to please her and not in a sexual way. Although that option was DEFINITELY still on the table, he was more concerned with her happiness. He found himself spending more and more time with her and her offspring and enjoying it. He thought she may feel something more for him but as his powers did not work on her, he couldn’t be sure. Linda had told him before that the Detective could have feelings for him but he didn’t know if he should believe her. He wanted to believe her.

But he should have known it was too good to be true; known that he couldn’t have anything real with the Detective. He was beginning to think that he learned all there was to know about torture from his Father. How else could you explain the fact that He had allowed Lucifer to stay on Earth for so long; long enough to become attached to someone so special and then take it all way? It was just too cruel but no more than he should have expected. He also figured that was why nothing had happened after he killed Pierce other than his physical appearance. No need to send any of his siblings to drag him home when he had no other choice.

He had received a call from a detective in charge of Pierce’s murder investigation asking him to come down to the precinct to give his statement. He was able to finesse his way out of making a physical appearance but did give a statement over the phone. Since he couldn’t tell the absolute truth, he played fast and loose with the facts so that he told them what they needed to hear but didn’t incriminate himself. From the general direction of the question he knew that the Detective was considered the prime suspect. He was sure that was the Detective’s plan.

Through his contacts at the hospital, he knew that they had kept her overnight for observation but she was expected to be released that morning. He knew the extent of her injuries and that they believed she would make a full recovery. He would not blame her if she never wanted to see him again, but he knew she would come; she was a woman of her word after all. He would listen to whatever she had to say but his mind was made up. He would return to Hell where he belonged, where monsters dwelled.

His phone dinged, indicating he had a message. It was from the Detective.

_/C: I’d like to come over now, if that’s ok? /_

After a few moments he replied.

_/L: I will be here. /_

He returned to the living room and made his way to the piano. He hadn’t tried to play in his demon form before but now seemed like a good time to give it a whirl. His demonic hands were slightly larger than his angelic ones but he was still able to strike each individual key. Something unwound inside him with the realization that he would still be able to play and he began a repertoire of his favorites. Bach, Beethoven, Muddy Waters, Howling Wolf, artist he had known over his previous times on Earth. The Blues music spoke of anguish and futility, while Beethoven’s dark and moody compositions fit his current mood perfectly. He poured everything he had into the music. Anger, despair, longing and a deep sadness that seemed to come from a never ending well within his being. He played until the keys began to shred from his claws but even then, he continued as long as the music flowed. He sent it out into the ether, into the void and emptied himself, leaving behind a hollowed-out husk of a celestial being. 

When he had poured everything he had into the music, he slowed, sending the last note on its way to follow the others and rested his hands on the keys. The Detective would be here soon, so he closed the fallboard to cover up the damage and returned to the balcony. The stars would be out soon; well the few that were bright enough to shine through the light pollution of the city. He planned to gaze upon them as much as he could as well.

Lucifer had heard her when she called him after exiting the elevator. He would have known it was her even without her saying a word. He always felt a pull when she was near, a pull that had increased the more time he spent with her. Even now she had the gravitational pull of a black hole upon him; he was powerless to resist her.

She made her way onto the balcony but he couldn’t look at her; couldn’t look upon the damage he had inflicted on her. After an awkward silence when neither said a word, she finally addressed him.

“Thanks for seeing me,” she said. Her voice was still pretty raspy. “I know it’s been…,” she stopped. “I don’t know what to say, Lucifer. Sorry just isn’t enough.” She let out a sigh and sat in one of the deck chairs.

The raspiness of voice twisted his gut. He had done that when he had choked her. He wasn’t really listening to what she said but when she sighed and sat down, he finally looked at her. The left side of her face was an ugly shade of purple but it was the finger marks on her neck that really upset him.

She had leaned her head back on the chair when she sat down but now, she looked up at him and he was surprised not to see fear or condemnation in her gaze. All he saw was sadness and a plea for forgiveness. What would she need forgiveness for? He was the monster here.

She blinked and swallowed, looking away from him; he saw the expression in her eyes close off when she regained her composure. She told him what she knew of the investigation; how IA and the FBI were taking over the investigation. How it seemed her plan was working, not that it was any comfort, but at least he had nothing to worry about.

“I’m not worried about me, Detective. It’s you I’m concerned about.” He had not moved closer to her but he couldn’t stay silent any more.

“I’m fine, Lucifer,” she told him. “Really.” She tried to convince him she was alright.

“Your face says otherwise,” he quipped, taking a drink from the glass in his hand.

“I will heal.”

Neither spoke. There was so much to say and neither knew how to start. He could tell she was tired. She should be at home getting some rest, not sitting on his balcony, pretending nothing had changed.

“Detective,” he finally said, his voice flat and cold, “you should go home and get some rest. I have remained here and you have come by and informed me of the progress in the case. Our deal has been fulfilled. There is really nothing left to say. As you can see, I am unable to resume my human appearance so I will be returning to Hell. I have some unfinished business to attend to but afterwards, you will never have to see me again.”

Chloe just looked at him and made no reply. She nodded her head as if she was mulling over all that he had just said.

“That’s your final say?” she asked, one eyebrow raised. “You’re leaving and I should go home and rest?”

He nodded before turning away from her.

“Very well,” she said as she rose from her chair and headed back into the living room.

Lucifer remained exactly where he was and waited for the sound of the elevator arriving to take the Detective out of his life for good. After several minutes went by and he still hadn’t heard anything, he looked inside only to see the Detective disappear down the hallway that led to the guest rooms.

‘What the fuck?” he thought to himself as he went to see what she was up to. He found her in the same bedroom she had stayed in the night of Charlotte’s funeral. What he saw had him dumbfounded.

She had a duffel bag on the bed and she was taking out clothes, placing them in a dresser drawer. As he watched, she took out a toiletry bag and headed into the attached ensuite.

“What are you doing?” he asked when she came out of the bathroom.

She stopped and faced him. “You’ve had your say but I haven’t had mine. We still have to talk and I’m staying until we do. I’m on suspension and Dan has Trixie so I have nowhere else to be. But I’m tired, I’m going to turn in for the night and we will talk in the morning.” She went back to unpacking.

He gaped at her, at a loss for what to say. He didn’t know whether to be angry or impressed by her audacity. It seemed she had planned on staying all along since she came to his home with a packed bag. He finally just left her when he could think of nothing to say.

Throughout the evening, he found himself inexplicably drawn back to the guest room several times. He knew she was asleep; he could tell by her breathing. Whenever he returned, he stood in the doorway just watching her. She was lying on her left side away from the door leaving her dominant arm free so that she could access her firearm if need be or so he assumed. He wanted to stand there all night and watch her, drink in the sight of her and commit it all to memory. But he ached for more and before he could stop himself, he had stretched out on the bed, close to her but not touching. He tried not to wake her and when she didn’t move, he figured he was safe so he just lay there, feeling that constant pull that drew him to her.

He only wanted to take comfort in her nearness but he must have dozed off because she suddenly moved, startling him. Before he could remove himself from the bed, Chloe had turned over and placed her head on his chest and draped her arm across his torso.

Lucifer froze, arms poised in the air hoping she didn’t wake up. She would probably shoot him if she found him in bed with her. Although he might welcome a bullet to the heart if it would make the ache go away. But she didn’t awaken. Instead she seemed to settle even closer to his side. He finally allowed his arms to come down and rest on the bed. He placed one hand on her lower back, feeling her heart beat, while his other hand gently griped hers resting on his chest.

He finally allowed himself to relax when several minutes passed and nothing happened. He couldn’t believe she was snugged up to this monstrosity but she probably wasn’t aware he was there. He hoped so anyway; it was enough that he had hurt her he didn’t need to frighten her as well. While he lay there, he thought of all the things he should have done differently; all the things he wished he had told her when he had the chance.

Gazing at the ceiling and listening to the Detective’s gentle breathing, he decided to finally tell her all that he was feeling, all that was in his heart. But he spoke to her in a language he had not uttered in an eternity. He could speak all languages but this one was special. This was his native tongue, one he wished to share with her. There was really no true English translation for the words he spoke, but this was the feelings he wished to express:

_My Beloved._

_My North Star._

_My guiding light in the darkness._

_You pierce my heart with your warmth._

_You vex me, challenge me._

_You are my beginning and my end._

_My life._

_My love._

_My everything._

_I love you now until the end of time._

_My cherished one._


	5. Chloe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but it seemed like the place to stop.

Chloe waited for Dan to pick her up at the hospital. She was getting anxious just sitting there in the lobby but they wouldn’t let her leave on her own. He said he would be there as soon as he dropped Trixie off at school but that seemed like hours ago.

She tried to give him the benefit of the doubt; traffic could be brutal at this time of the morning but she was about to jump out of her skin. She needed a shower in the worst way and she really hated hospitals.

They didn’t speak much on the ride to her apartment. When they got there, she asked him if he wanted to come in. He agreed and once they were inside, she made her way to the kitchen.

“Do you want some coffee?” she asked him, her voice was still raspy but the soreness was getting better.

“Naw, that’s okay. I need to be getting to the precinct anyway,” he replied. “Listen, Chlo, I don’t know what happened and you don’t have to tell me, but…” he stopped, putting his hands on his hips as he collected himself, “I’m here if you need me, okay? If you need anything at all.” He looked at her then, taking in her bruised face and neck. His anger over everything that had happened over the past couple of months bubbling just under the surface.

Chloe didn’t say anything. She knew her ex was hurting, had been hurting since Charlotte’s death and she hadn’t been a very good friend. Instead of replying to him, she went over and wrapped him in a hug. After barely a second, he hugged her back. His grip tightened for a moment and she felt him shake just a little. She held on, taking and giving comfort to the man that had once meant so much to her life. His familiar scent and the feel of his arms around her were a balm to her trouble mind. Even though their marriage was a disaster, she was happy that they had been able to remain friends, not only for themselves but for their daughter.

They broke apart and she gave him a minute to regain his composure before saying, “Thanks, I appreciate it, but I’m fine, really.”

Dan reached out and gently touched her bruised cheek. “Death was too good for that bastard,” he said, referring to Pierce. 

“Look, Dan, I’m so sorry I haven’t been there for you lately. Ever since Charlotte…,” she paused not being able to continue for a moment, “and I know you've been hurting and wanted justice for her but he’s gone now and he won’t hurt anyone ever again.” 

“I know,” Dan said, wiping his face and avoiding her gaze. “But I just wish…,” He was just so angry and didn’t know what to do about it. 

She placed a hand on his arm in a show of support.

Clearing his throat, he said, “I’ll keep Trix for a while so you can heal up and not have to worry about her. Maybe you can talk your _partner_ into coming in to the station to give a statement. No one’s seen him.” The way he said ‘partner’ let her know he was still pissed at Lucifer.

“Dan,” she scolded, “Lucifer didn’t do anything wrong. He’s not the bad guy here,” she continued defending him, “everything that happened was Pierce’s fault.”

“But he left…,” he started only to be cut off by Chloe.

“No, Dan. I won’t have it. I know you are pissed at the world right now but taking it out on Lucifer is not going to make it any better. You need to get help.” She was pleading with him at the end of her little speech, her voice pretty much gone.

Dan knew she was right but he had been angry for so long now; directing his anger at Lucifer had given him an outlet but he knew it was wrong. He had walked away from her but now he turned back.

“I’m sorry, Chlo, I…,” he couldn’t finish. 

Chloe went over to him and took his hand in hers. “Promise me you’ll get some help. Just talk to someone.” Her voice was no more than a whisper by this time but she wanted him to know she still cared about him. “Please?”

Dan just nodded his head and giving her hand a squeeze, left to head in to work. 

After Dan left, Chloe made her way upstairs and took her long-awaited shower. She stood under the water for the longest time letting it wash over her. She felt dirty but it had nothing to do with the blood and sweat from the day before. No, she felt unclean on the inside. Talking to Linda last night had helped, had given her some clarity but she still felt guilty for what she had done. She just hoped Lucifer could forgive her. She hoped she could forgive herself.

Afterwards, she wrapped up in her fuzzy robe and returned downstairs to make herself some soup. She really hadn’t eaten anything in the hospital and she knew she needed to keep her strength up even if she wasn’t hungry.

Later she tried to get some sleep, but she couldn’t stop thinking about Lucifer and what she and Linda had talked about. She still hadn’t called him yet. She hadn’t even texted him. She was stalling and she knew it. 

So, instead of resting like every one told her to, she started cleaning the house. She straightened the living room, putting Trixie’s toys away and finished up some laundry. While she was cleaning, she was also making plans for confronting Lucifer. She knew he would be at the penthouse, he had given her his word, she just had to make herself go to him.

By the afternoon, she had run out of things to clean and she knew she couldn’t put off going any longer so she texted him. It was several minutes before she got his reply, long enough that she thought he would tell her not to come over but he eventually agreed to see her. He didn’t add his customary devil emoji at the end of his text. Her heart clenched at the omission.

She went to her bedroom to change her clothes and get ready to go see him.

Chloe took an Uber to Lux since her car was impounded. She probably would have taken one anyway. The painkillers they had prescribed for the pain were pretty powerful. She caught the driver giving her furtive looks in the rear-view mirror. She knew she looked like she had gone 10 rounds with Mike Tyson, but she didn’t care.

When Chloe arrived at the penthouse, she didn’t see Lucifer at first. She put her purse down by the bar and called out. Granted her voice was not very loud right now but she knew he could hear her.

She saw movement out on the balcony and made her way outside. He was off to the side in the shadows and she saw that he was still in his other form. She waited for the fear to set in but she was pleasantly surprised when it didn’t. In fact, she had no fear, no fear at all. She only saw Lucifer – her Lucifer – at least he used to be; she had no idea what they were to each other now.

She started to speak to him but gave up when she realized how closed off, he was.

It seemed so hopeless. He wouldn’t even look at her. She sat down and rested her head back on the deck chair but soon looked at him, willing him to turn and face her.

He finally did but he seemed so distant, cold, out of her reach. She was afraid of this and her sadness and guilt showed without her even being aware. She blinked back the tears and told him what she knew of the investigation. It was a safe topic and she was working her way up to what she really wanted to say.

Then he told her of his plans to return to Hell and she knew she was losing him. It was as she feared, he was shutting down, shutting her out. She could feel him putting distance between them but she wasn’t going to let him go without a fight. She had come prepared for this and after nodding her head a few times as if she was mulling over all he had said, she got up and made her way back inside.

Instead of going home like he assumed, she grabbed the duffel bag she had dropped outside the elevator and made her way to the guest rooms. If he wanted her gone, he was going to have to haul her out himself. She knew he would follow her but she could be just as stubborn and besides, she was dead on her feet. She had little sleep in the last two days and she had taken some painkillers earlier. 

He did follow her, even asked her what she was about, but left when he couldn’t think of anything else to say. She finished her unpacking and prepared for bed. She crawled beneath the covers and was asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Chloe was having the most vivid dream. It had to be a dream because this place was far too perfect to be anything else.

She was sitting in a large meadow strewn with wildflowers. The flowers were of every color in the rainbow and perhaps a few she had never seen before. The meadow stretched down to a lake that was so clear and so still that its surface reflected the crystal blue sky and the mountains in the distance. The mountains were quite impressive; two craggy snow-capped peaks on the left and gentle rolling ones on the right. She could see a stream winding its way through the valley, reflecting the light that was shining behind the snow-capped mountain range. That light was 10 times brighter than the sun, but the mountain kept her from seeing it directly.

She felt an incredible sense of peace, of wellbeing, unlike any she had ever known before. She wanted to stay there always.

As wonderful as she felt, it could not compare to the joy she experienced when the music started. It came on the wind and seemed to caress her ear with the gentlest touch. She felt it on her skin and in her veins. It surrounded her and filled her with an incredible sense of love, love in its purest form. She closed her dream eyes and let the music flow over her. She never wanted it to end.


	6. Lucifer and Chloe

Chloe woke to sunlight streaming in the room. It took her a moment to remember where she was but when she did, she let out a sigh. She noticed that the other side of the bed was a little messed up and thought that she must have been tossing a lot in her sleep. She got up and took care of her morning toilet and dressed in jeans and a t-shirt before calling Trixie to tell her good morning. She was pleased to notice that her voice didn’t sound raspy anymore and her face and chest weren’t as sore either. Maybe all she needed was a good night’s sleep after all.

She followed the smell of coffee until she found the kitchen. She had never been in Lucifer’s kitchen before but she knew he must have one. The kitchen was just a posh and high-end as the rest of his apartment which shouldn’t have surprised her as much as it did. She found Lucifer in his robe and pajamas, prepping something on the opposite counter. He had not returned to his human appearance.

“Good morning,” she addressed him.

“Good morning, Detective.” He greeted her, placing a cup of coffee in front of her.

She took a seat at the island counter and took up the coffee cup. She couldn’t get a read on his mood but they had all the time in the world as far as she was concerned.

“Thanks.” She took a sip. It was exactly how she liked her coffee. She couldn’t stop the small smile that graced her face.

Lucifer had risen before the sun had breached the horizon and eased out of the bed, careful not to wake her. In that he was successful at least. Relieving the ache in his heart, not so much.

He watched the sun come up before going inside to make coffee and start on breakfast for her. It was the least he could do. He knew when she had awakened and heard her puttering around in the guest room. He thought he heard her speaking as well but figured she had probably called the Spawn.

Lucifer was prepping ingredients for crepes when she made her way into the kitchen. He put the finishing touches on her coffee and placed it in front of her when he greeted her. He returned to the crepe batter.

“Lucifer,” she began. It was obvious to Chloe that Lucifer was still distancing himself from her so it was up to her to start, “I know I just invited myself to stay yesterday but I don’t regret it. It may have been exactly what I needed.” Her voice was stronger today than it had been. Maybe it was the sleep she had gotten because she felt really rested.

He still did not turn around so she continued, “I slept really good, just remind me not to take TWO painkillers at the same time.” She gave a short laugh. “My throat feels better and I could swear the bruise on my chest is lighter than it was yesterday. And I had the most amazing dream.” 

Lucifer had gone still when she mentioned how she felt. He knew why she felt so much better today and why her voice was no longer raspy. When he had awakened earlier that morning, his right wing was draped across him and Chloe. He must have called it into this plane subconsciously to comfort the Detective. The Divinity inherent in the wings had healed her somewhat. But he was confused about the dream. Dreams were not one of his gifts; that was Gabriel’s domain. Before he could stop himself, he asked, “What kind of dream?”

She looked at him over her coffee mug, glad that he had turned to face her. “I don’t know really.” She said, shaking her head a little. 

“It almost didn’t feel like a normal dream at all. It was so vivid. I usually don’t remember my dreams after I wake up but this time… this time I remember most of it.” She went on to describe the meadow of wildflowers; the crystal blue sky; the lake, the mountains and the light in the distance. Then she spoke of the music on the wind and Lucifer dropped the bowl he had in his hand.

She stopped speaking when that happened, wondering what she said that that caused him to drop the bowl. Although it was harder to read his demonic face, she could tell he was surprised. He actually looked shell-shocked. He was staring at her like he’d never seen her before; like he didn’t know who she was.

“Lucifer?” She left her seat to move around the island. He backed away from her, but she kept advancing but stopped before she touched him. Something was clearly wrong.

“How…,” he gasped. “How did you…? How can you…?”

“Lucifer, what is it? What’s wrong?” she was getting really worried now.

Lucifer felt untethered, like the world as he knew it was shifting beneath his feet. ‘How did she know what it looked like? How could she know that?’ he kept asking himself. Then he remembered how he spoke to her last night. Was that it? Did she hear him, subconsciously? Did speaking to her in his native language pull that image from him and transfer it to her mind along with his words? It was the only thing that made sense.

“Lucifer, please, tell me what’s wrong.” She didn’t know what to do. She wanted to touch him but she knew he would bolt if she did. He was still staring at her.

“Detective,” he breathed out, barely making a sound, “what you saw, what you dreamed, you’ve just described the Gates,” he paused, “the Gates of Heaven.”

To say that she was shocked would be an understatement. She was absolutely stunned but she knew it was the truth. She could feel it. That sense of peace, of wellbeing could only be from another plane of existence. She backed away from him then, giving him some space. 

“How is that possible?” she said, confused.

He looked away, not wanting to answer her. How could he tell her what he did last night? She would be furious with him if she knew he had invaded her privacy, never mind that she wasn’t even aware he was there at the time. He knew it was wrong but he had never been able to resist temptation and she was the very soul of temptation to him.

He made to move past her but she was standing so close to him, he stopped. He needed to change the direction of this conversation. “It doesn’t matter, Detective. Once I’m out of your life, you’ll never be bothered with anything Celestial ever again.” 

“Stop it Lucifer,” she demanded, getting in his personal space, “stop shutting me out.” She blinked a few times, trying to regain her bearings after Lucifer’s mood swing. He could run hot/cold in the space of a moment and it made her head spin. “You know what, you had your say yesterday, now it’s my turn.” All the hurt, despair and worry she had been feeling lately suddenly came to the forefront.

“You say you are leaving, returning to Hell, without even trying to fight for the life you’ve built here. For your right to lead your own life. I thought that’s what you wanted.” He hadn’t moved away from the counter but he didn’t try to interrupt her either.

“I never figured you for a coward, Lucifer.” 

That got a reaction out of him. “Careful, Detective. You’re talking to the Devil after all.” His voice cold. How dare she! How dare she call him coward. What did she expect him to do? Just look at him!

“I don’t give a fuck who you SAY you are, I KNOW who you are!” She was practically shouting at him.

“You have no idea who I am! In case you haven’t noticed, Detective, I’m a monster and monsters belong in Hell.” He pushed past her then, heading for the bar. He needed a drink.

She followed, hot on his heels. 

“You say you’re a monster but I know that’s not who you are. That’s not what I see when I look at you. You want to know what I see?” she asked him. “I see my partner. The one person I can always count on to have my back, to believe in me when I don’t believe in myself. The only person I trust explicitly. I don’t care about what’s on the outside, I know what’s underneath.” Her voice was steadily becoming more passionate with the strength of her feelings.

“How can you say that?” he said, knocking back his drink before pouring another. “How can you say I am not a monster? Look what I did to you!” he said, pointing at her face. “That is my hand print on your neck, in case you have forgotten.” He turned back to the bar.

“And I shot you, so I’d say we are even in that respect,” she threw at him.

“But that was different.”

“Was it? You told me to shoot you and I did. I told you to hit me and you did. I don’t see the difference.”

“I killed a man, Detective," he said, trying a different tactic.

“So have I Lucifer,” she countered, yelling.

“Was it your own brother? Hm?” he yelled back.

She hesitated before she answered. She knew about Uriel; he had finally told her one night after a trying case and she knew he still had a hard time dealing with that pain but he wasn’t the only one with a past.

“No,” she said, “but I did kill a 15-year-old boy.”

That stopped him. He just looked at her, putting his drink on the bar and waiting for her to continue.

“I was fresh out of the academy and it was a hostile situation. The boy was high on some new street drug and was holding his 8-year-old sister hostage. He had a gun and was waving it at anyone who got near.” She sighed, remembering that time like it was yesterday. She was no longer looking at him but rather through him as she relived the memories. Her tone of voice had also taken on a resigned note.

“We tried to talk him down; tried to get him to surrender but he just wouldn’t listen. Probably couldn’t listen because of the drugs so, when I got a clear shot, I pulled the trigger. I only meant to wound him but he moved at the last second and I ended up shooting him in the head.”

Lucifer didn’t know what to say. He had never heard that story before. She had never talked much about her early career but he had never asked her either. He could see that it still bothered her but it still wasn’t the same. She was nothing like him.

“What if I told you that I wanted to kill Pierce? That I went to that loft with the plan of ending his miserable life?” He went over to her then, allowing her to see the anger and hatred he felt for Pierce, “I didn’t have to kill him. He was mortal at that point, having lost the mark my Father had placed on him and I’m an Archangel, if a fallen one. I could have subdued him easily but I didn’t. I stabbed him,” he emphasized, “and I would do it again if I had the chance.”

She didn’t reply immediately so, he just nodded his head, going back to the bar to retrieve his drink. At least she understood now.

“So, you are saying that because you wanted to kill Pierce, killed him when you didn’t have to and feel no remorse over it, that makes you a monster?”

“Yes,” he said simply, knocking back his drink. 

“And you have to return to Hell because that’s where monsters reside?”

“Precisely, Detective. I’m so glad you finally understand.”

She nodded her head at that, chewing on her lower lip for a minute or two before she continued, “Well, I hope you have a nice spot picked out for me when I get there.”

“What?!” He exclaimed, turning and looking at her like she had lost her mind.

“Well, that’s what you said. All monsters belong in Hell and I am one.” She told him defiantly.

“What the hell are you talking about Chloe?” Why did she think she was a monster? She was the purest soul he had ever known.

“Malcolm,” was all she said.

He blinked at that but he didn’t say anything.

“I shot Malcolm. I killed him. I didn’t have to but I wanted to. He was a bad cop. He hurt people that I lov… care about.” Tears had started spilling over her cheeks at this point but she kept on, “he kidnapped my daughter. I went to that hanger wanting to kill him and I would do the same thing again.” She was in his face by this point, trapping him between herself and the bar.

“By your definition, that makes me a monster.”

“No,” he couldn’t believe what she was saying, “no, Chloe, you could never be a monster.” 

“You can’t have it both ways, Lucifer.” She wiped the tears from her face but she wasn’t finished. “You don’t see me as a monster and I don’t see you as one. I never will.”

“How can you say that? Just look at me.” his voice full of disbelief.

“I am looking at you Lucifer and I see you. I see the real you.” She was so close to him she could feel the heat radiating off his skin.

“How?” he was practically speechless.

“Because I love you, you idiot,” she told him.


	7. Deckerstar

_I love you, you idiot._

Those words kept bouncing around his brain like a ping-pong ball but he couldn’t believe that he heard her correctly. She couldn’t love him, could she? However, the look on her face was nothing if not earnest and she hadn’t finished speaking.

“I love you, and I don’t give a flying fuck if your Dad had a hand in my life,” she said, poking him in the chest to emphasize her point. “This is real. MY feelings are real. I know they are.”

Lucifer felt the passion in her voice, saw the depth of her feelings in her eyes and he believed her. He would know if she was lying and she so obviously wasn’t. His knees gave out and he slid down the bar to the floor.

Chloe fell to her knees, following Lucifer to the floor. Now that she had started, the dam burst and everything she felt for him came spilling from her mouth.

“You want to know why I know it’s real?” she said, looking into his fiery depths. ” Because, when I first met you, I didn’t even like you. I thought you were a dick.” She laughed a little at that but Lucifer continued to stare at her like she was some fancy new object he had never seen before.

“But then I got to know you, worked side by side with you. I’ve spent practically every day with you, Lucifer. Do you really think I could have spent all that time with you and not know who you are?” She scooted closer to him. 

“You’re narcissistic, irreverent, childish, on occasion,” she grinned at him, “and you never follow the rules, but you are also passionate, generous, protective, caring, even if you deny it. Knowing you has made me look at life differently. You have been a pain in my ass since day one but I find that I want you in my life. I miss you when you aren’t there and yes, I still really like working with you. I need the eggs, remember?”

She reached out to touch his face. He flinched away from her but she was undeterred and continued until her hand rested along his jawline. His skin was very warm and firm but it didn’t stop her from rubbing his cheek with her thumb. 

Lucifer never said a word while she talked. He simply could not comprehend the fact that she felt the way she did; that she cared for him like she said. He leaned into her touch without being aware that he was doing so; the feel of her hand on his face was like nothing he had ever experienced. No one in his entire existence had ever touched his devil face with such tenderness, caressed it with such care. His heart sped up and his breath came in shallow pants. His eyes never left her face.

“For so long I tried to deny my feelings, telling myself that I wasn’t in love with you; that we were just good friends and partners and that I was happy for things to stay that way. And I was doing a pretty good job of convincing myself until you showed up with Candy.” The memory of that time still affected her more than she liked to admit.

“It hurt so much and I couldn’t figure out why. Why would it hurt so much if we were just friends? But I was so jealous, I couldn’t see straight. That’s when I knew, when I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. That’s why I started seeing Pierce.”

He started at that and tried to say something, but she placed her fingers over his mouth to keep him quiet. She wanted to have her say.

“I’m not blaming you Lucifer,” she assured him, “I thought I was moving on but I realize now that I was just running away. And then I found out who you really were and things got, well, complicated to say the least.” She had moved her hand from his mouth back to his jaw. She let her eyes travel over his face taking in every detail, from the rigid scars on his scalp to the cleft in his chin. She still had no fear.

“But I didn’t stop loving you and that frightened me more than learning who you were,” she admitted. “You were the Devil, but you were also an Angel, an immortal. You had powers beyond my comprehension. What - who could I ever be to you?”

The whole time she spoke, she caressed his face. Her fingers gliding across his brow and down along his temple, moving past his ear to the back of his head before returning to his jaw. 

“The reason I did what I did yesterday was because I love you and I would do anything, anything at all to protect you. You have to know that.” She met and held his gaze. She brought her other hand up to cup his face between them.

“You say that you are bad, that you’re evil, but Lucifer, I have seen evil and you are not it. You’re not a monster, not to me.” And with that, she leaned in and kissed him.

Lucifer froze when her lips met his. He was afraid to move; afraid this was all some dream and he would wake up at any minute but she continued to kiss him. She started with his lips then moved to his cheek, his forehead, the frown line above the bridge of his nose. He closed his eyes as his feelings began to overwhelm him. He felt her kiss each eyelid before she captured his lips once more. She sucked his bottom lip into her mouth and bit down causing him to gasp at the sensation and she took advantage of that fact to slip in her tongue. When she made contact with his own, the tightly wound coil of desire he had been keeping on a leash suddenly snapped. One arm crushed her to his chest while his other hand gripped the back of her head. He growled into her mouth as he deepened the kiss.

This was like no other kiss they had shared before, no gentle touching, no friendly caress. This was a kiss full of passion, desire, hunger. They poured everything they had into the kiss. All the joy, pain, need and love they had; all of it passed between them as their lips met and their tongues danced.

Chloe’s heart soared when Lucifer finally returned her kiss. She had wanted to kiss him for so long she didn’t even care about his form. He was her Lucifer and she loved every part of him. All the while she kissed him, she continued to run her hands over his jaw and down his neck to his shoulders and back to his face. She didn’t care that his skin was tough and leathery; that the scars on his scalp were hard and rigid; that the hairs on the nape of his neck were soft and silky.

Wait, hair?

Chloe broke from the kiss and stared. A small part of her brain registered the fact that Lucifer chased her mouth wanting to continue the kiss and had let out a small whimper but she couldn’t stop looking at him, at his face.

He opened his eyes at the sudden change and she stared in to his warm chocolate brown orbs, at the unfathomable depths that drew her in. She felt such joy, such love she couldn’t help the huge smile that spread across her face.

“Hi,” she said, still smiling and pulling on the hairs at the back of his head.

Lucifer was confused when she broke off the kiss and let out a whine (sound, sound! The Devil does NOT whine). Why had she pulled away? Did she realize she made a mistake? Was this some cruel joke? But then he felt her pull his hair when she greeted him with a simple ‘hi’. He immediately looked down at his chest, at his hands and knew that his angelic façade was back.

“Chloe,” he said, his voice reverent, before pulling her onto his lap and crushing her lips with his own.

He moved from her mouth to her jawline, being mindful of her injured side, and rained kisses over her face and eyes much like she had done with him. When he reached her neck, he kissed and licked each bruise, bathing them in a loving caress. She arched her back when he sucked on her pulse point, pressing her breast into his chest and he could feel himself getting hard. He placed his hands on her hips, attempting to move her off his lap but she ground her core down on his growing erection and he stopped what he was doing to look at her.

“Detective?” he asked, his voice uncertain but hopeful, searching for the answer in her sea-blue gaze.

“It’s Chloe,” she scolded him teasingly, “so shut up and kiss me.”

He didn’t have to be told twice.

Keeping a firm hold on Chloe, Lucifer stood up and headed to the bedroom. Chloe let out a surprised squeak at the sudden movement and wrapped her legs around him. She held on to his shoulders and placed her head in the crook of his neck where she trailed kisses up to his ear. She knew he had no problem carrying her with his inhuman strength. 

He laid her on the bed and pressed himself against her, settling between her thighs and steadily kissed her. He ended the kiss and rose up, resting his elbows on the bed to caress her injured jaw with the back of his fingers.

“Chloe,” he breathed, looking over her face before finding her gaze, “I have a confession to make. About your dream. Why you dreamt of the Gate of the Silver City.” 

She had been running her hands over his shoulders and biceps but she stilled her hands when he said that. This wasn’t what she was expecting. She honestly thought his mouth would be otherwise engaged. However, she could see he was serious so she gave him her undivided attention.

“Last night, when you were sleeping…,” he started, “I told myself that I was just making sure you were alright, that you were resting but just looking at you wasn’t enough. I… I lay down, just to be near you, I promise.” He wanted to assure her. “I thought I would be leaving Earth soon and I….” He was finding it very difficult to tell her this but he needed to be honest with her before they went any further. 

Chloe was confused. She dreamed of Heaven just because they were in the same bed? That didn’t make any sense. She had ‘slept’ with him before and nothing like that happened and she told him so.

“Yes, but you see, I did something last night that I hadn’t done before.” He continued, but she was still looking at him with a confused expression on her face. “At one point you turned over in your sleep and well, you snugged up to me actually. I was quite surprised, I can tell you, and I decided then to tell you – finally tell you how I felt, how I really feel about you.” 

He said this last with such a look of tenderness that her heart skipped several beats. She simply waited for him to continue, afraid to say anything lest she break this spell he was weaving.

“I did tell you but not in English,” he explained, all the while stroking her face. “I spoke in the first language, the language spoken by Angels.” 

“Oh,” was all she said, at a loss for how to respond. She never thought that there might be a different language in Heaven but of course, it made sense. But she knew that Lucifer abhorred anything connected with his former life, the life he had before he fell. He had ranted about it enough that the sentiment was abundantly clear. That he would speak a language that was so intimately connected with that life, speak it to her, was overwhelming and rendered her speechless.

“I can only assume that the words I spoke created an image of the entrance in your subconscious.” He concluded, brushing the hair away from her brow and waited for her to respond to what he had said.

She ran her fingers through his hair and caressed his face. He turned to kiss her palm but never broke eye contact. She couldn’t form words to tell him how she felt at that moment, how his words affected her. She looked at him so long without speaking that the he began to look uncertain, fearful of having said the wrong thing. She couldn’t let him retreat within himself or lose this moment with him, she had to move past the lump of emotion in her throat.

“What… what did you say?” she finally managed to croak out.

The look in Lucifer’s eyes went from uncertain to panic. He didn’t expect her to ask that, to put him on the spot of actually speaking it aloud to her. He tried to deflect her query by trailing kisses along her neck and jawline but she wasn’t having it. She gripped his face in her hands and raised his head to look him in the eye.

“Lucifer,” she said, the determined look on her face compelling him to tell her.

He knew he couldn’t resist the look in her deep blue eyes, eyes more luminous than the stars he had made. He started and stopped speaking several times before letting out a large sigh. He grinned down at her before finally finding the words he wished to say.

“Chloe, I love you.” After he said the words, he shook his head before continuing, “But that word just isn’t enough, doesn’t say all that I feel for you. There are not enough words in the English language to convey the depths of my feelings for you.” He was starting to babble but he couldn’t help himself. Much like Chloe, once he started, he couldn’t stop. “Perhaps, that is why I chose the first language, a language of light and music, although now that I think about it, maybe I should have composed you a song. Never was much for poet….”

She stopped him with her fingers on his mouth. This man, this incredible being was fluent every language except the one of the heart. The partner that she couldn’t get to shut up sometimes was now tongue-tied when it came to words that mattered. But there was another language he was adept in and it was that language that she wanted him to use so, she stopped his ramblings.

“Show me.” She let all the love she felt shine through her eyes.

The change that came over his face was instantaneous. Gone was the uncertainty, gone was the unease replaced with a smoldering look and a seductive grin on his face. He flicked his tongue out and stroked her fingers before pulling them into his mouth.

Releasing her fingers, he purred, “with pleasure,” before kissing her once more.


	8. Deckerstar 2.0

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNING: Strong sexual content.**
> 
> **Ok, here comes the smut. I will try to keep it clean but who am I kidding, it is hot, steamy devil sex so, you have been warned.**
> 
> You can probably skip this chapter if gratuitous description of sex are not your bag. 😉

Lucifer kissed her deeply, plunging his tongue inside and stroking her tongue and the roof of her mouth before moving off to kiss down her neck. His hand had come up to cup her breast through her t-shirt and he ran his thumb over her nipple causing it to stiffen in her bra. 

Chloe was busy running her hands over his back and shoulders; carding her fingers through his hair, tugging and pulling the short hairs at the nape of his neck. She had rarely seen his hair without all his products and now it was a riot of curls that she couldn’t resist. 

He ghosted his mouth over her other breast and she couldn’t stop herself from arching her back, trying to make contact, only to have him move out of her reach. He chuckled slightly before moving down to her stomach. He pushed her shirt up and began raining hot open-mouthed kisses across her belly, dipping his tongue in her navel. 

She grunted and twisted her body away from him. She had never liked that sensation and she hoped he got the message. Apparently, he did because he moved lower and ran his tongue across her skin where her body met the top of her jeans. Chloe was moaning and writhing as Lucifer’s fingers caressed her skin from her side to her hip before moving to the button of her jeans. Gripping the sheets, she raised her hips trying, without success, to find the friction she so desperately needed.

He opened the button of her jeans before unzipping them. She hitched up her hips to allow him to pull them down her legs. He rose from the bed as he peeled her jeans off and tossed them to the ground. Chloe sat up on the bed and took off her shirt, throwing it to land near her jeans. She was reaching behind her back to undo her bra when Lucifer stopped her, telling her to leave it on for now. She did as he asked and looked at him standing by the bed. 

The robe slipped from his shoulders and he let it fall to the floor. He was perfectly formed; broad chest, strong arms, taut abs that led her eyes down to the prominent erection tenting his pants. The sight of him standing there looking at her like he wanted to eat her caused a wave of lust to hit her so hard she gasped and heat flooded her body to pool between her legs. Just when she thought he would join her back on the bed, he dropped to his knees and took her foot in his hands. She fell back on the bed, delighting in his attentions. Neither said a word, words were unnecessary.

He kissed the top of her foot, her ankle, before trailing kisses up her leg, even biting the inside of her knee. That move had her crying out. She had no idea that was an erogenous zone but leave it to Lucifer to find it on her body but coherent thought left her when he reached the juncture of her thighs. Her breath caught in anticipation and she felt his hot breath on her arousal-soaked underwear. She shuttered and wondered who was making that the high-pitched keening sound and was shocked to realize that it was her. She raised her hips again and again, wanting him to touch her only to be denied when he moved down to give her other leg the same attention as the first.

Finally, finally, he made his way back to where she needed him the most and she was going to scream if he didn’t touch her now. He placed soft teasing kisses along the inside of her thighs. She was on fire, her body consumed in the flames of desire. She gasped a whispery ‘please’ and nearly came undone when he ran the tip of his nose up her slit through her underwear. He eased his hands up her thighs and gripped the edge of her panties and peeled them off. She was too aroused to feel self-conscious about her state of undress.

‘Yes, yes, yes’ she thought to herself and maybe even said the words out loud but he still hadn’t touched her. Several minutes passed and still nothing. She raised her head to look at him. What she saw had her body quivering with desire and lust coursing through her veins once more.

Lucifer had been taking his time, savoring every moment of this time with Chloe. He had dreamed of this since the first time they met and he was not going to rush it. He cataloged every moan, every gasp, every shutter of her body, storing it in his memory for future reference. He would give her his all. He would give her everything he had. When she was finally bare to him, he took a moment to drink in the sight of her. Her sex was glistening and she was keening with want and it was music to his ears. His nostrils flared and he inhaled a deep breath.

‘Oh, Father’ he unknowingly whispered to himself; her scent set fire to his very being. His desire was so intense that his eyes flared up. This is what Chloe saw when she looked at him between her legs. Her gasp caused him to look up at her and she met his fiery gaze with a lustful one of her own. Time seemed to stand still as their eyes locked with hunger and need. Never breaking eye contact, Lucifer stuck out his tongue and swiped a broad stripe up her apex. Chloe’s thoughts skidded to a halt at that point and her world narrowed down to the area between her legs.

Lucifer ran his tongue over and around her nerve bundle, giving it flicks and strokes, all the while listening to the sounds coming from his Chloe. Up, down, back, forth, short strokes or long, he did it all and played her like a finely tuned instrument. He found what she liked the best and alternated that with sucking on her clit. That got the greatest reaction out of her and he had to place his hands on her hips to keep her on the bed. When he had teased her enough to bring her close to the edge, he upped the ante by holding her thighs apart and plunging his tongue into her silken core. He fucked her with his tongue, curling the tip at her entrance to stroke her sensitive spot, causing her to keen louder than ever before.

“Fuck, Lucifer,” she moaned and wave after wave of pleasure began to build low in her belly.

When he felt her walls begin to flutter, he replaced his tongue with two of his fingers. His tongue stroked her clit while he kept up a fast, steady rhythm with his fingers. She began to buck off the bed so he placed his other arm across her hips, keeping her in place. He knew that would intensify her climax and she was close. He rose up in order to watch her as he pumped faster and faster, striking her G-spot with every stroke.

“Ghaagh,” she couldn’t form words, her mind consumed with the intense feeling centering on where he was stroking her. She could feel her climax building but it was coming so fast, it was frightening.

“Come for me Chloe, come for me love,” he crooned, edging her closer with his silky voice. He stroked her faster and faster until she finally screamed and crashed over the edge. He felt her walls clench down but he kept pumping through her orgasm, drawing it out. 

She wailed as her orgasm hit her and she rode the waves that he drew out of her but he didn’t stop. To her surprise, she felt another climax build, more intense than the first. She tried to cry out to Lucifer to tell him to stop, that she couldn’t handle another so soon, but words were beyond her. She was going to fly apart if he kept it up. 

Sensing her anxiety, he encouraged her, “Oh, Chloe. Come on, love, give me another. Don’t worry, I know you can handle it. Let’s see if you can squirt.” He redoubled his efforts on her hot, dripping wet core.

Chloe really wasn’t listening; her whole world was nothing but the pleasurable sensations radiating from her core to the rest of her body. Before she knew it, an orgasm hit her like a tsunami and she felt liquid splash along her thighs before Lucifer dived back down to her sex, lapping at her.

Lucifer drank up all she had to offer; her wonderful liquid desire was sweeter than honey and more intoxicating than the finest whiskey. He could never get enough. He felt her body begin to relax after her climax and he moved back up her body, nipping her hip and kissing across her stomach. He reached underneath her and unhooked her bra. In a moment it was across the room to join the rest of her clothes. Her breasts were small and pert and fit in the palm of his hand. Running his thumbs over her nipple he felt more than heard her sharp intake of breath. He could also feel her accelerated heartbeat. He couldn’t resist laving one hard peak while rolling the other between his thumb and fore-finger.

It was some time before Chloe became aware of her surroundings. She wasn’t sure but she may have passed out and one thought was front and center in her mind. Lucifer had indeed never lied, especially about his abilities in the bedroom.

“What…,” she panted, her heart still pounding in her chest, “what the hell was that?” Where did that water come from? Oh shit, did she... did she pee on him? That had never happened to her before. She blushed from her head to her toes.

Lucifer had raised he head from her chest when he heard her inquiry and noticed the blush on her face. Thinking it was in response to his attentions, it took him a moment to realize that it was embarrassment. What could have happened to make her feel ashamed? Wait - what did she ask? ‘Oh’, he thought he understood. He moved up to her face. 

“Chloe, darling,” he murmured to her, “have you never squirted before?”

She still wouldn’t look at him but she shook her head. 

“No, no, no, love, look at me. There is no place for shame in the bedroom. Especially with me. Tell me, did you enjoy it?”

She looked at him. There was no recrimination in his gaze, no laughter at her inexperience, just love, tenderness and understanding. Her discomfort seemed to bleed away and be replaced with pleasure as she realized that she did indeed enjoy what happened, now that she knew that was what he was trying to do in the first place.

“That has never happened before, but yeah, I liked it. I’ve never felt something so intense.”

“Oh, my dear, I am honored to be your first.” Lucifer’s smile spread across his face until it reached his eyes. To know that he had given her a new experience, that he was the first to please her in that way was incredibly satisfying.

“Now, I would be honored to reacquaint myself with your breasts. They are my old friends and I must say they are much better than their digital counterparts.” He put a teasing smirk on his face and waggled his eyebrows at her, easing the rest of her discomfort.

“You’re such an ass,” she laughed, feeling relieved.

He began to ravish her breasts, her body responding with tingles running from her head down her spine to her sex that began throbbing with need. She felt his hard length on her thigh and she desperately needed to feel him, all of him. She began hitching up her hips trying to give him a hint of what she needed.

Lucifer felt her begin to writhe from his attentions and moved up to her face once more. “Darling,” he hummed, “I have waited an age to have you wanton and needy in my bed. I plan on taking my time.” He smirked at her while his moved his hips, rubbing hard cock against her clit.

She let out a moan when the silk of his pajamas grazed across her most sensitive area. “You have on too many clothes.” She ran her hands down his back until she reached the waist of his pants and began pushing them down.

He wiggled out of her reach, chuckling as he did so and stood by the bed once more. He dropped his pants and stood, allowing her to look her fill.

And look she did. She had seen him naked before, he had no problem with nudity and had proudly showed her his glorious self on more than one occasion. She knew he was well endowed. However, all those other times he had not been hard and erect. She couldn’t take her eyes off of him and he swelled with pride under her scrutiny. In fact, the longer she stared the more puffed up his chest became and a self-satisfied smirk spread across his face. 

And was he… was he preening? Yes, yes, he was. That smug son-of-a-bitch was preening at her. Standing there like he was God’s gift to women – wait, that was exactly what he was, wasn’t he?! He was a Son of God, the Angel of Desire and Pleasure for both women and men. 

As she watched, the smile on his face went from playful to predatory and her heart rate sped up at the sight. With feline grace, he crawled on the bed, stalking up her body, his eyes never leaving hers. The throbbing between her thighs increased tenfold.

He continued up her body until she was pinned beneath him and she could feel his hard length pressing against her core. His hand traveled up from her hip to her breast and he trailed open-mouthed kisses along her shoulder to her collarbone, up her neck to her ear. He hummed low in his throat as he felt Chloe run her hands up and down his back and couldn’t contain a shutter when she dug her nails in the area between his shoulder blades. The area over his wings was very sensitive and he almost came undone when she did it again. Resting his head on her shoulder, he panted until he regained control of himself.

Chloe noticed Lucifer’s reaction when she raked her nails across his shoulders. He was shuttering and moaning into her neck and she decided to give him a break. That area of his back was obviously very sensitive so she ran her hands lower to grip his ass. Oh, he had a great ass and it fit her hands perfectly. She squeezed and ground him into her core, reveling in the feel of his cock on her, sliding back and forth along her folds. She heard Lucifer catch his breath and her desire hit the stratosphere.

Lucifer took over moving his hips but Chloe kept her hands where they were. The ache in her center was becoming unbearable. She needed him, needed to feel him inside her, filling her with his rigid member. However, a small voice in the back of her mind suddenly made itself known and she stilled her movements.

“Condom,” she breathed, hoping she could get his attention.

He looked at her but didn’t stop the movement of his hips. “Different species, remember?” He knew there was no need for one but he would use one if she insisted.

She thought about it for half a second. Fuck, he was the Devil. Would he even be able to get a disease? Fortunately, she had her IUD in, so she felt pretty safe there. 

“Never mind” was all she could formulate while he was doing those things to her with his body.

He reached down and gripped himself and ran the head of his shaft around her clit before moving to her sopping wet entrance. He eased in the head and stopped to allow her time to become accustomed to him. She was hot, tight and silky and he had never felt anything more wonderful than Chloe’s walls gripping him as he pushed in inch by tantalizing inch.

Chloe couldn’t contain the deep moan that escaped her lips as he entered her. He was easily twice as big as her ex and Dan was not small. Lucifer’s mouth and hands seemed to be everywhere. Her neck, her breast, her shoulder and she couldn’t get enough. She appreciated that he was taking it slow but she wanted more so, she hooked her legs around his waist and dug her heels into his ass, letting him know what she needed. It worked because he picked up his pace, driving into her, and it felt amazing. 

Lucifer began thrusting into her, drilling her into the mattress and was ecstatic when she started rising up to meet him thrust for thrust. Before he could stop himself, he began speaking, saying the things he never thought he would have the courage to say out loud to her.

“Chloe,” he panted, “My beloved. You are my life, my love, my light in the dark.” The movement of his hips accentuating his words. “Without you I am lost, wandering. You ground me. You are my cherished one.”

Chloe heard his words and they resonated in her soul. This is how he felt, how he really felt but could not say before. The words slid across her ear and she heard an echo of the music from her dream and without conscious thought, she dug her fingers in his back between his shoulder blades once more.

He gave a hiss and rose up on with his hands on either side of her shoulders. This allowed him to watch her and gave him the added advantage of changing his angle. He aimed to have her screaming his name when she came this time.

She started to feel the tell-tale signs of her impending orgasm but it was slightly different. She attributed it to the fact that it was coming during intercourse, something that had never happened to her before. No matter how good the sex, she just never could climax during the act itself. But this was Lucifer so of course, he would give her that experience as well. She wanted, needed more of something, friction maybe, to help her along and in a move from her academy training, she pushed off the bed and flipped Lucifer over so that she was straddling him.

Lucifer was caught off-guard and found himself lying on his back with Chloe above him, bouncing on his cock, riding him for all she was worth. She had her hands on his chest as she rose and lowered herself on his rigid shaft and he gripped her hips, helping her along. She was glorious as she abandoned herself to her pleasure and he drank in the sight of her.

‘Oh, this was better,’ Chloe thought to herself as she rode Lucifer. That feeling in the center of her being was getting stronger with each thrust, each change in her hip angle as she came back down to seat him deeper inside. The feeling began to become so big so fast, it almost seemed like it wasn’t coming from within her body but more like from without. Unknowingly, she voiced this thought aloud.

“Lucifer,” she cried out, “it’s… it’s coming.” She no longer had control over her movements, her body taking the reins and driving her home.

When he heard her cry out, it sparked something within him and he felt a build-up of pleasure like nothing he had ever felt before. But he needed more so, he raised up into a seated position to get a better angle to thrust into Chloe. He placed one arm around her waist and the other across her back, gripping her shoulder and drove into her harder and deeper. Relentlessly, he pounded and could feel his climax coming fast and strong. Her walls began to clench and he felt a corresponding tightening in his balls. 

They climaxed together and three things happened simultaneously.

Firstly, Chloe screamed his name, throwing back her head, arms spread wide.

Secondly, Lucifer roared and his wings unfurled to their fullest extension, knocking a lamp off the bedside table and striking the window with such force it cracked.

Thirdly and most amazing of all, light radiated out from every feather of said wings.

Bright white light poured from Lucifer’s hands and feet. 

Luminous Divine Light exploded from where they were so intimately joined and penetrated Chloe’s entire body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! Thanks for sticking with me. 😜 I went back and changed the rating to Explicit. This chapter got pretty steamy.


	9. Afterglow

Lucifer took a moment to bask in the after effects of the most intense orgasm he could ever remember having. He felt marvelous, invincible, powerful. Energy flowed over his skin and sizzled in his blood. He hadn’t felt this much power since…

His eyes sprang open, he looked down at Chloe. She wasn’t moving.

“Chloe!” he exclaimed. When he jostled her, her head fell on his shoulder. She was limp in his arms, having been knocked unconscious when he climaxed and unleashed his power, his light. He knew that light, was intimately familiar with it. It was the same light he used to ignite the stars.

Panicking now, he stuck his fingers under her jaw, trying to find her pulse. For one heart stopping moment he couldn’t feel it but then, there it was. Her heart was still beating strong and regular. He let out a relived breath.

He eased her off his lap and turned to lay her on the bed. It was then he noticed that his wings were out. When had that happened? It must have been at the same time. Things were going from bad to worse; it seemed like he didn’t have control over anything. 

“Bloody wings,” he grumbled to himself before shrugging them away.

He gently laid her down and finally got a good look at her. If he had any doubt that his light had penetrated her body, just looking at her confirmed it. She was glowing, not metaphorically but actually radiating light. Her skin had a soft golden glow but her hair was shining brightly against the black satin sheets. He had always said she was more beautiful than anything he had ever seen but now she out shone his stars.

“What have I done?” he said aloud to no one, still trying to rouse her by gently tapping her on the face and calling her name. He couldn’t wake her up. He was growing desperate when she finally responded although she never opened her eyes.

“Mmm,” she hummed and stretched, “that was heav...en...ly.” 

She made no other sound but at least he knew she would wake up. He breathed easier. He just didn’t know if there would be any harmful effects. Surely no human could handle that much power without some lasting damage, could they?

He sat looking at her wondering why his light had come back to him now. Nothing like this had ever happened to him in his long life. If he could still access his light bringer power, why hadn’t he been able command it to light Azrael’s blade when he wanted to? What was so different now?

He needed answers. He needed to know if he had done something wrong, something that would have catastrophic consequences. He knew of only one person that may be able to help but he wasn’t sure if he would still answer his call but he had to try. For her, for Chloe.

He eased out of the bed and grabbed his robe, heading into the living room. Closing his eyes, he placed his hands together palm to palm and prayed to his brother.

_Amenadiel, brother, I need you. Please. It’s an emergency._

He waited with baited breath, hoping against hope that his brother would respond. When several minutes passed and he didn’t hear or see anything, he turned toward the bar. If there was ever a time for a drink, it was now. He should have known he was all alone now.

Suddenly, he heard a swooshing noise and turned toward the balcony in time to see Amenadiel land and put his wings away. His brother advanced into the penthouse.

“Luci,” he addressed Lucifer, strolling over to his younger brother. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

“Thank you for coming, Brother. Something’s happened that’s never happened before.” Lucifer whispered, coming over to the other Angel. He glanced toward the bedroom.

Amenadiel looked toward the bedroom also and could see that there was someone there but couldn’t make out who it was. Surely, Luci didn’t call him down here to talked about his sex life. A scowl formed on his brow when he looked back at Lucifer.

“What’s going on Lucifer?” Amenadiel’s voice was calm but demanding when he could see that Lucifer was on the verge of panic. “Tell me what happened.”

Lucifer heaved a sigh. “The Detective and I,” he looked back to where she was, “we… we had sex and well, something happened when I… you know.” He made vague gesturing motions near his groin with his hands.

Amenadiel rolled his eyes, this was the emergency, telling him that he and Chloe had finally gotten together? He was going to strangle him.

“Please tell me that you didn’t call me down here to gloat over you and …”

“No, it’s not that,” Lucifer cut him off, “When I came, my wings burst out and so did my light. My light went through Chloe.”

Amenadiel looked toward the bedroom once more. “Is she alright?” This was indeed serious.

“I don’t know, now do I?” He was getting frustrated. “She's fucking glowing! I hope she will be okay but what if she isn’t or what if something else…”

“Calm down, Luci. What can I do? How can I help?”

“I need to know, if she will be alright. That I haven’t damaged her in some way. But also, I have to know, has anything happened in the world that wasn’t supposed to happen? Like, a tsunami no one was expecting or a long dormant volcano suddenly erupting and wiping out millions?” Lucifer’s voice was quivering as he asked his questions, unsure what he would do if something like that really had happened. 

“Why would you think that?"

Lucifer just looked at him in exasperation.

“I have not heard of anything but I will check, if you like.” Amenadiel said, trying to appease his younger, more volatile brother.

“Would you?”

“Of course. I will return.” He gripped Lucifer by the shoulders and gave him a nod.

Lucifer watched as Amenadiel went out to the balcony, unfurled his wings and flew off. He returned to the bedroom to keep watch over Chloe.

Lucifer had brought the chair closer to the bed, wanting to be close to her but also wanting to be able to watch the balcony. His brother should be back at any minute. Chloe was sleeping deeply but he was happy to see that her skin was no longer glowing although her hair was still pretty bright. He really hoped she would be okay. He looked back out toward the living room. Did he hear something? Nothing was there, just the curtains blowing in. 

Lucifer began to get nervous. Shouldn’t he be back already? He knew his brother had his full powers, surely, he would have been able to check on things by now? 10 minutes went by, then 20 before Lucifer got up and started to pace. When 30 minutes passed, his was in full panic mode. What had happened that would delay his brother for so long? What had he done when he released his power?

About the time he was going to start begging his other siblings (and possibly his Father) for help, he heard the tell-tale sound of wings before Amenadiel landed. He rushed outside.

“Bloody hell, what took you so long? What’s happened? Did I hurt her? Did I start something?” His questions came quick and panicky.

Amenadiel did not answer right away, simply looked at Lucifer, waiting until his finished. He remained calm in the face of Lucifer’s tirade.

“Luci, nothing has happened. Everything is fine.” 

That brought him up short. “Really, nothing? Then what took you so long? Where have you been?”

“I took a look around the world but I noticed nothing strange. Then I returned home to talk to Zuriel. He had no indications that anything had happened that wasn’t supposed to happen. I also asked about Chloe. As the keeper of the books, Zuri would know if there was a change in her timeline but again, nothing. There has been no change.”

“Then why did my light come back?”

Amenadiel just shook his head and shrugged. He didn’t know.

“Lucifer, Chloe is special, maybe…”

“Maybe nothing, I need to know why it happened. What if it happens again? I could kill her.” Didn’t he understand? He had a chance at happiness. A chance with Chloe. Was he going to lose her now?

A sudden thought occurred to Amenadiel, “You love her, don’t you?” His voice full of awe.

A soft look came over Lucifer’s face. Of course, he did. He loved her more that life itself. 

“Yes, I do. Very much.” He couldn’t stop the smile that graced his face.

Amenadiel smiled back at him, clearly seeing the love written all over his younger brother’s features.

“Does she… does she return your affections?” From what he knew of Chloe, he did not think she would take this particular step without deep feelings for his brother.

Lucifer nodded his head, unable to voice his happiness, remembering all he felt when she said she loved him.

“She does, Brother. She knows who I am, what I am, has seen all sides of me and she still she says she loves me.” Even now he had trouble accepting her declarations.

“That’s wonderful, Luci. Don’t you see?” Amenadiel beamed, warming up to his spiel. “I firmly believe we Angels determine our own identities. You have never felt this way about another human. Your love for her and hers for you has made you feel powerful, worthy and so your Celestial powers have returned. Much like when I…” He stopped, remembering the pain when Charlotte Richards was murdered.

“When Charlotte sacrificed herself to save my life,” he continued after a moment, “I wanted to be worthy of that sacrifice, wanted to be an Angel she would be proud of. It was then that I desired my wings once more, not for myself, but for her, to take her home and my powers returned.”

Lucifer looked at his brother. He had suspected that Amenadiel had regained his powers around the time of Charlotte’s death but he had no idea that she had sacrificed herself to save his brother’s life. 

“I had no idea she did that. I am glad you were able to take her home, Brother. She deserved nothing less.” Lucifer could see that the memory still caused him pain. 

He took a moment to think about what Amenadiel had said. Did he control his own identity? That couldn’t be true, could it? His Devil face was a punishment, his punishment for rebelling against his Father, wasn’t it?

But he had lost his Devil face. When he had decided to be honest with Chloe, tell her who and what he was, he was kidnapped before he could but the wish was still there. He had felt better about himself at that time. And when he woke up in the desert, his face was gone and his wings were back. Could he have caused all of that to himself? Deciding to trust Chloe with his true identity felt like the right move, something he needed to do because he cared too much for her to continue deceiving her. Could that have changed his physical appearance? 

When he had killed Cain, hadn't he felt like a monster again? Felt he deserved to be punished once more? And hadn't his Devil face returned?

More importantly, hadn't he been able to change back after the one person whose opinion mattered above all others, the one person whom he loved, said they loved him despite knowing what he had done? That meant that it must be true, right? His current form gave proof to that assumption.

But Lucifer was a creature bred out of pain and rejection. An eternity of being an outcast would not allow him to accept what his brother would have him believe and besides there was Chloe to think about. He could not in good conscious stay with her if he could harm her.

“What you say may be true, but that does not answer my question about Chloe. How can I stay… be with her if I will hurt her?” 

“What if it was a one-time thing? Your powers, can you control them?” Amenadiel asked him.

Lucifer could actually feel his powers flowing through his veins. In fact, he had not even realized he could still feel it since it was so familiar and only when he thought about it, did he notice its presence.

He brought his hands together and concentrated. Light began to flow from his fingertips to gather between his palms. The brightness intensified to the point of blindness before Lucifer waved his hands and the light vanished. He indeed had control over his light once more.

“And Chloe is different. She is a miracle.” Amenadiel continued, “I think you can trust that it won’t happen again.”

Lucifer still wasn’t sure but it seemed like his brother would be of no further help. He had checked on things as he said he would. It would have to be enough for now. 

“Besides, I spoke to someone else while I was in the Silver City.”

"About Chloe? Who? Rafi, Gabe, Sabdiel?" Lucifer looked at his brother, expectantly.

“No, Father,” he said calmly.

“What?” Lucifer was shocked to say the least. His Father had spoken to his brother? Why?

“Why? Why now?”

Amenadiel shook his head, at a loss himself. “He summoned me to His Garden. I was very surprised, shocked, but I heeded His request.”

“Well, what did He say?” Lucifer gestured for him to hurry up.

“He asked me to give you a message.”

This could not be good. Nothing his Father ever told him was good. Preparing to fight whatever missive his Father had decreed now, he said, “I’m not going back, Amenadiel. I do not care what Father says. I will not be ordered about, not anymore. And why is He sending messages through you? I thought that was Gabriel’s job.”

“Maybe He thought you would listen if it came from me. I do not know why He asked, only that He asked it of me.”

Lucifer didn’t say anything to that. He would hear what his brother said; no one said he would abide by it.

“He said, tell him ‘It is a Gift’,” the air quotes were implied.

“Gift? What’s a gift? What’s that supposed to mean?” Leave it to his Father to be cryptic.

“I don’t know but perhaps He means you and Chloe. He did have a hand in her life, didn’t He?”

That much was true, Lucifer had to concede that but it didn’t make it any easier to swallow. He hated that his Father had meddled in his own life let alone Chloe’s.

“And was that all? No direct orders?” Nothing was ever straightforward where his Father was concerned.

Amenadiel only shook his head. He had delivered the message his Father had given him. He had no idea what it meant.

Lucifer looked askance at him before looking back toward the bedroom once more. He wanted to return to her, to Chloe. He would deal with whatever happened next with her by his side. 

“Well, Brother, as much as I have enjoyed this, I have a lovely lady waiting for me in the other room. So, if you will excuse me.”

Amenadiel huffed out a small laugh. He was happy for his brother and wrapped him in a huge hug before he could walk away.

Lucifer stiffened for a moment before returning the embrace. He really did appreciate his brother answering his call and helping him. Maybe he was not alone after all.

“I am happy for you, Brother.” Amenadiel said before stepping back and unfurling his wings.

Lucifer watched him go before returning to the bedroom, crawling back in bed with Chloe.


	10. A New Beginning

Chloe woke feeling very happy and very hot. She could feel a warm body snugged up to her back and gentle breathing near her ear. She smiled a small smile when she thought of her Devil.

She reached out to push the blanket down and got a handful of feathers. ‘Did they rip the duvet?’ she mused to herself. Sex with Lucifer had been pretty amazing but she didn’t remember them doing THAT. 

She opened her eyes. What she saw had her mouth gaping open.

They hadn’t ripped the down-filled duvet. No, what she took for a blanket turned out to be a gorgeous white wing. She still had her hand on it and she could feel the rigid bone beneath the luminous feathers. His wings were fully healed, that she could see, but she was surprised that he had them out.

She didn’t want to wake him but she couldn’t resist the urge to run her fingers over the downy feathers. She caressed the top of his wing joint lightly. The wing twitched slightly at her touch but she continued down ridge as far as she could reach.

Gathering her nerve, she pushed her fingers into the underside of the wing and delved into the softer feathers there. Oh, they were so warm and velvety to the touch and she kept going until she reached the skin underneath.

“Mm, tickles,” she heard Lucifer mutter behind her. She stilled her questing fingers. She heard Lucifer gasp when he startled awake and with a low ‘bugger’, she felt him move and the wing disappeared.

She turned over to face him, staying within the circle of his arms. He was wide awake and looking at her like he was afraid she was going to run from him once more. She reached out to stroke his face and was glad to see the relief return to his eyes. He even gave her a small smile.

“Apologies, Chloe. The blasted things seem to have a mind of their own.” 

“No, it’s okay. You can have them out if you want. I don’t mind.”

“Haven’t you had enough Celestial nonsense for one day?”

“Lucifer, they are a part of you. I love all of you remember?” She gave him a smile while she stroked his face. 

His heart stuttered and he felt a pleasing ache when she said she loved him. He didn’t think he would ever get used to her saying it. Kissing her palm once more, he never broke eye contact.

“Can you… will you show me?” She looked at him, hoping he knew what she meant.

He hesitated, still not believing she was at all comfortable with his other side. He felt it was a punishment and not something she should care about but he could never deny her anything she deemed to ask him so he relaxed and let his other face show.

When Lucifer’s face changed, it was not as a slow melt from one to the other. Instead, one minute she was looking into the hypnotic brown orbs of an Angel, the next, she was gazing into hellfire irises residing in a sea of midnight black. In one blink of her eye, she went from feeling the enticing scruff of his five o’clock shadow to the rough scared planes of his demonic face. She blinked again and all traces were gone but she knew it was still there and she was glad. It too was a part of him.

“I’m glad it’s still there,” she whispered. Her hand had never left his face.

“Why?” he wondered. This woman would never cease to amaze him. “You cannot honestly tell me you like that face.”

“No, but Lucifer I don’t want you to change who you are. You are not just the Devil; you are also an Angel. You will always be both so yes, I am glad because that is who I fell in love with, all the parts of you. And besides, how would you get any confessions out of the bad guys using this handsome mug.” She teased him, gently smacking him on his face, happy to share this time with him.

He could live another eternity and still not understand this incredible woman. How she could love him, knowing all that he was, all that he was capable of? It would forever leave him in awe. His eyes flicked between her eyes and her lips then back again. He couldn’t resist kissing her.

He only meant the kiss to be an affirmation of all that he felt for her and her acceptance but Chloe had other ideas. She kissed him back with more passion and began running her hand down his side, inching ever closer to his groin. Suddenly, he broke from her kiss and moved away quickly.

“Who’s hungry, hm? No dinner last night and no brekkie today, I’m sure you are famished.” He continued as he got out of the bed, grabbing his robe and leaving the bedroom.

Chloe was shocked when he broke away from her so quickly and watched in utter confusion as he – there was no other word for it – fled the bedroom.

“Lucifer?” she called after him, scooting across the bed, grabbing the sheet as she went.

“Lucifer.” She followed him into the kitchen. He didn’t stop or acknowledge her.

“I’ll just clean up this mess and make you something, shall I?” He was cleaning up the spilt crepe batter from earlier.

“Lucifer!” she demanded, finally getting his attention. “What’s wrong? Is this… is this because I asked to see your other face?”

“No, don’t be ridiculous.” He scoffed, taking the bowl to the sink and grabbing a towel.

“Then what? Why did you stop me?” A heaviness filled her heart and a coldness settled in her gut, “Was this… was this a game to you? Now that I’ve finally slept with you, you are done with me?” Tears were pooling in her eyes and her voice quivered with emotion.

“No, Chloe, never.” He looked shocked that she would say something like that. Didn’t she know how much she meant to him?

“Then what is it? Why don’t you want me to touch you? Why did you flee the room?” She still wasn’t convinced that she hadn’t done something wrong.

Lucifer was frozen in indecision. How could he tell her that he was afraid to have sex with her? That he could hurt her if he was not able to control his light? Afraid that his brother was wrong and it wasn’t a one-time thing? But she was standing there wrapped in his bedsheet, looking at him with such pain in her eyes, that he knew he had to explain somehow. Instead of answering her, he moved around the island, grabbed her wrist and made his way back toward the bedroom.

Chloe was taken aback when he grabbed her and her first instinct was to pull away, but his grip was like steel and it was all she could do to keep up with him. She briefly wondered what his intentions were when he headed to the bedroom but he didn’t stop and continued into the bathroom. What the…?

Lucifer stopped and placed Chloe in front of him before he turned her to face the floor length mirror.

“Chloe, tell me what you see?” He said, nodding toward the mirror.

Chloe had twisted her body somewhat in order to keep looking at him but now turned to the mirror he was indicating.

‘What did she see? What was he going on about?’ she wondered to herself as she looked at their reflection. She saw them obviously but that couldn’t be what he was talking about so she kept looking and she did notice something. Moving away from Lucifer, she approached the mirror, her hand moving to her face, her jaw specifically. The bruising on her face and neck were gone, her skin flawless. She worked her jaw up and down, but there was no pain, not even when she pushed in with her fingers. She looked at Lucifer’s reflection, her eyes wide.

“How…,” she began, still amazed at her recovery, “Did your wings do this?” It was the only thing she could think of that made any sense. She did wake up with his wing draped over her after all.

“They may have been part of it,” he conceded, “but is that all you see?” He had made a discovery when he had rejoined her in bed after his brother had left. He wondered how long it would take before she noticed it as well.

What else could there be, she had no clue, but she turned back to the mirror. Her eyes never left her face, wondering what he could be talking about but then she saw it, or rather it was what she didn’t see. Her fingers made their way across her shoulder to where the scar left behind by Jimmy Barnes’ bullet should be. It was not there. It was not faded or lighter in appearance; it was gone as if it was never there to begin with. She turned to look at the back of her shoulder. The exit wound scar was gone as well. She turned back to Lucifer, wanting, needing an explanation.

“What’s the last thing you remember, Chloe?” he asked her, “Before you passed out.”

She huffed a sigh and rolled her eyes, what did that have to do with anything?

“Just tell me.”

What did she remember? It was kind of hazy in her mind. She remembered wanting him, needing to feel him and the exquisite feeling that came over her when he entered her for the first time. But that wasn’t all she remembered now that she was thinking about it.

“I remember feeling a need for something, something more, so I flipped you over. I felt something building, getting bigger until it seemed to take over.” Her brow furrowed, wondering if she was making any sense but he just returned her gaze and let nothing show on his face.

“I remember screaming your name then everything turned white.” A blush spreading across her features as she recounted their first time together. “What’s going on, Lucifer?” she questioned.

Lucifer didn’t say anything at first and continued to stare at her without blinking in that otherworldly way he had and she began to get scared. What had happened?

“Detective… Chloe,” he corrected himself, “When you… when I… bloody hell, when I came, my light burst out, along with my wings. The same light I used to create the stars came out of me and went through you,” he confessed hurriedly before he lost his nerve. “That light has brought you back to the state you were in the day you were born. Back to beauty base one, if you will.” He stopped and waited for her to reply, unsure what she might say.

She didn’t know what to say. The light he commanded to bring about the stars in the sky went through her body? What could she say to that? She believed him, it explained the white, but she didn’t see a problem. She felt fine. Better than fine actually. She felt invigorated, energized, whole in a way she hadn’t felt before.

“Okay? So, your light came out and went through me, I don’t see a problem. I feel fine,” she told him, still not sure what was so wrong.

He couldn’t believe she didn’t think it was a big deal. To his mind it was a very big deal, how could she not see it?

“Chloe, no human was designed to withstand that sort of power. I could hurt you, ki… kill you.” His voice a mere whisper on the last word.

She went to him, finally understanding what was bothering him. But something, some instinct didn’t believe that, couldn’t believe that. Surely his Father, fate or whatever wouldn't be so cruel as to allow them to come this far just to take it all away.

“But I’m not just any human, remember?” she reminded him, reaching up to touch his face. “I’m a miracle.”

He wanted to believe her, wanted nothing more than to lose himself in her eyes and her heart but nothing good ever happened where he was involved.

“That’s what Amenadiel believes as well, but I can’t take that chance. Not with your life.”

“Amenadiel?” she wondered. She thought he went back to Heaven when Charlotte died.

“I… called him, prayed to him actually. You were unconscious and I didn’t know if you…,” he couldn’t finish, remembering the panic that had set in when she was limp in his arms.

“And?” she tried to keep him on track.

“He said that you were special, that it may be a one-time thing.”

“Did he say why he thought that? That it might only be once?” she asked him.

He held out his hand, palm up and light began to flow from his fingers, creating a small ball of light in the center of his hand. He kept it small but Chloe couldn’t take her eyes off that ball of energy. He closed his hand and extinguished the flame.

“Now that I can control it, he thinks it won’t be a problem.”

“But that’s great, isn’t it?”

“I don’t bloody know now do I?” he said, more forcefully than he intended but he was clueless about what it all meant and he hated feeling powerless. “What if I can’t? What if it happens again and next time, you’re not so lucky? I can’t lose you, Chloe.”

“You won’t lose me,” she assured him. “Look, we’ll figure this out, you and I. We make a great team, remember?” She smiled at him. She really didn’t know what it all meant either but she did know she was willing to fight for him, for them. “If we have to take it slow, we’ll take it slow. Whatever it takes, as long as we are together, no one can take that away from us.”

“There’s something else. Amenadiel also had a conversation with my Father.”

That was certainly a surprise. From what Lucifer had told her, his Father (God!) hadn’t spoken to his children in ages, an eternity even. Why would he speak now?

“I though He didn’t speak to anyone anymore? Why would he speak to Amenadiel now? Was… was it about me?” She was afraid of the answer. To know that the Almighty was speaking about her, had her in His thoughts was terrifying.

“I don’t know why He would suddenly condescend to speak and I have no idea if it has anything to do with what happened. Father has never been straightforward.”

“What did He say?” Again, she was not sure she wanted to know the answer.

“It’s a gift,” he told her simply.

“Gift? What’s a gift?”

“In case you haven’t figured it out already, Chloe, my Father delights in being obtuse. It may not mean anything; it could be my Father yanking my strings again. Dangling this chance of happiness in my face only to snatch it all away in the future.” His agitation beginning to show as he raved. “It may all be some cruel joke.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” she tried to soothe him. She knew she could never attempt to understand the history between Lucifer and his family but that didn’t mean she couldn’t try to be there for him. “Forget about your Father, your Brother, everyone. I’m here and I’m fine.”

“But will you stay fine,” he addressed her, reaching out and stroking her face.

“Lucifer, nothing is guaranteed. You know this. Three years ago, I never dreamed I would be here, with you. But I am now and I don’t plan on going anywhere. Whatever happens, we can face it together.” 

Lucifer had fallen before, the biggest fall of all time perhaps, but this fall was one of his own choosing. He fell for Chloe a little more each day and never more so than at this moment. Her unwavering belief in him, in them, shook him to his core. He would never feel worthy of her, of her love, but he would spend an eternity trying to be the person she thought him to be.

“How do you do it? How do you give the Devil hope?” he said, completely in awe of this incredible woman.

“Easy, I love you.” She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his chest. His arms came up and held her closer. She listened to the thudding of his heart and held him tighter, pouring all her feelings into her embrace.

“And I you,” he told her, squeezing her tightly and kissing the crown of her head. 

They remained wrapped in each other's arms, giving and taking what comfort the other could bestow. There was no hurry, no need to speak further, holding each other was all the language needed. 

And for the first time in his immortal life, Lucifer had hope, faith in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story turned out longer than expected but I'm pretty happy with it.
> 
> Kudos to you, dear reader, for reading my drivel. I am so happy you stopped by.
> 
> Until next time, blessings on you all.


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